Mi primera vez y con una trans (GDL)

It's my first time writing about this experience, I don't know if it's because of fear or nerves that they'll say or think something.....my first closeness with the world of transsexuals was with a movie I found in my father's collection of xxx movies...I was surprised to see a girl with a penis on the cover, not just any one, but really big one.....when I saw it closer up, I felt palpitations all over my body, started sweating a lot and feeling a really strong and sustained erection. It was many times that I touched myself while watching that movie, back then I wasn't older than 16 years old. Time passed and after my first failed romantic relationship with a girl at 20 years old, I started looking for casual sex to get her out of my head and also knew she had already moved on and was seeing someone else, a guy who was smaller than me and really didn't deserve it. I got annoyed a lot and still being a virgin at that age, so I started searching online groups and chats, where I found a transsexual named Rubí, we shared numbers and followed our conversations through WhatsApp, those conversations had audios, videos, and many photos, until one day we agreed to meet for the first time at her house, the intention was to have sex. I told her beforehand that I would bring condoms and only wanted to penetrate, as I never thought about being penetrated, then took a taxi and headed to her place, all the way thinking about how it would be, taking care with a condom, doing it and leaving, my head was blank, just thinking about sex and satisfying my desires and losing my virginity. When I arrived at her residence, she opened the door and immediately upon entering started kissing me passionately without control, touched my groin and I was already very hard, took me to her room by kisses and caresses, where we undressed to the sound of kisses and touches, in one of those touches I felt her penis, it was very hard, even more than I imagined and even more. My own, as they began to emerge pre-seminal fluids and in my mind I was only thinking 'why are they so excited?' As we lay there on her bed, I felt her turn me onto my side against the wall and she was touching my anus, lubricating it with her own fluids and saliva to try to get her fingers in, but couldn't. That's when I started feeling the head of her penis rubbing against my anus and the only thing going through my head was 'it's not me who's going to penetrate her? What am I doing? It's her house and it would be wrong to say no at that moment?'...That's what I was thinking when I felt an intense pain in my ass while she was taking hold of my neck and kissing my back, I realized I had been penetrated, adrenaline flooded my body at the same time as the pain, all I could feel were her hip movements which were slow but firm. After a while, noticing that I was hurting, she said 'relax, I don't want you to feel bad, I just want us both to have a good time' then she pulled out her penis, maybe it wasn't as big as mine but it was thick and she introduced it again with force, I felt something different, she had taken off the condom and was taking me bareback, all I could think was 'make it stop, get it over with!!! This is bad but at the same time it means I can do it to her too' everything was going through my head but not a word could come out of my mouth because I felt immense pain but at the same time I didn't dislike it. Finally, I felt like she increased her pace and even on my side I felt the heat of something inside me, it was her cum, she had let it all go inside me. I felt an enormous peace and at the same time an extraordinary warmth. I asked to be allowed to go to the bathroom where I took care of my needs and saw her cum coming out with traces of blood, despite everything, I never lost my erection and went back because now it was my turn to take her, but that's another story. Thank you very much for reading and patience, this is my first time writing and I hope for your recommendations. I am... from Guadalajara and I consider myself a bisexual person, I would like to live new experiences and am open to their proposals, many thanks.