Como hacer un orto

How to do an ass.

I decided to write about anal sex because of all the hysteria and fuss women make about giving up their ass. The average age where they give it up is around 20, 21 years old. That's about it. It starts to get more enjoyable later on, like at 25/26/27, when you stop sleeping with guys and look for experienced types instead of guys who just want to burst in there with their cock. The ass doesn't break or hurt. Making an ass is an art. I understand girls, when they're asked to do it and it hurts so much, but that's because the mutant in bed with them has a cock that's bursting out of his eyes and wants to put it inside a thimble. Repeat, making an ass is an art. The ass doesn't ask questions. When you ask, you lose. Except if the girl is really into it, really into minimal techno. If those three factors come together, then you can ASK for Booty, but usually, you just find it. To get her to give you Booty, you first have to know how to make it, otherwise, you'll be doing what we call in party slang: chain of favors. That is, if you do it wrong, the girl won't give up her ass anymore. Then, if I screw you over, she'll never give me the leather ring because some guy like you hurt her. Later on, I'll give instructions on how to make a good ass. By now, I can screw and laugh about my mistakes. First, you have to get in the mood, eat her out, be a jerk and walk around with your tongue hanging out like crazy, so you rub up against the Cyclops' eye (that's where you guys will laugh because I said Cyclops' eye and think I'm a gross guy). Once she's all wet and done, it's really hard to get her to go for it. Now, if you still haven't even tried, don't ask her to give up her Booty. Instructions for making Booty: 1. Grab her 2. Make her cum 2 or 3 times
3. Make her suck your cock very little, so it stays hot and wanting
4. Suck all the fluid
5. Get the gum out because you're making a terrible mess
6. Be an idiot and give her a tongue lash (only for cultured people)
7. If you see that when you gave her a tongue lash she tightens her cheeks or gets uncomfortable, stop everything and ask her... Does it bother you?
There are 2 options:
- Does it bother you?
- Yes, I'm bothered
- Why?
- I don't like it
- But I do, it's very good
- You told me not to, but would you like me to suck your booty? It's disgusting
- I wish you'd suck my booty!
- You're the worst Ariel!
- Take a 2, you're a mogolica.
In that case, the cutie leaves and you stay alone, and if you took Viagra you wasted $50 for nothing.
Then, what do I know, invite her to a few drinks first and let's resume the conversation...
- Does it bother you?
- Haha, no... it gives me little heartburn papeee
- Don't tell me papeee because you're driving me crazy babe, let me eat that colaaaa
- Oh... it tickles!
- But do you like it?
- Yes, I don't know
Ok, there you go, a positive one, 90% of cuties like having their booty sucked, so we can continue with the instructions.
8. She's got her ass up, and if you fall asleep for a second, she'll sit down and wait for you to do the missionary normally, so every second that she has her totó up is VITAL.
9. Round off the hole with the tip of your tongue
10. Put the little tip of your tongue in, but always with one hand playing with her clitoris, because doubts about whether it excites her 100%.
11. While you're teasing her more and more strongly and she's moaning like a pig being burned with a blowtorch, start putting your tongue in
12. She'll feel uncomfortable for the first 2 minutes, then she'll start pushing her ass towards you to let your tongue in more and more.
13. Grab the Prime box and check that it comes with a jewel that you always thought was an anti-humidity packet, open it and massage her anus with that

Lubricant.

14. If it doesn't come with lubricant, do a masturbation but don't use W40 at all.
15. Start putting your finger in, the tip of your finger
16. If the tip goes in, the finger goes in
17. If one finger goes in, after 3 minutes the other one does too
18. And if both fingers go in, it's like the cock is thicker than two fingers WE KNOW you don't have it. If you want to tell cuties that you measure 22x6, but EVERYONE KNOWS you don't measure that or that you're measuring with a ruler from the balls

19. Put the turtle head slowly into the Booty
20. Tell her guarangadas, they like the situation and the morbo of rape
21. Penetrate very slowly and deeper each time
22. She'll start to feel like she's shitting, if you think about it, it's rare, but they start to like it
23. Don't forget to keep going
24. The background music has to be something very relaxing, forget about Megadeth or System of a Down
25. Finish inside, don't think that after that the cutie will give you a blow job because you're really a son of a bitch

When you take it out, be very careful.
You can take it out with a carrot stick on the tip (more known as CABSHA ON THE TIP), or you can take it out clean like you put it in a bottle of water SER.

Here's the topic of not shitting at the next guy who gets screwed, if you take it out with a prize, make sure she doesn't know, otherwise she'll die of shame.
If you take it out clean, just show her and she'll stay calm.
If there's a smell of shit, well... what are you waiting for? That a GLADE plug comes out of your ass?

Finally, as a joke, check if the lips of the ass have stayed even, because after screwing it's like they're left with the caramel candies disordered, so if you're a mess, order her a little bit of the ravioles planchuela that was left messy.

Source: http://www.fotolog.com/los3kgroup/55836973mountain business