Perderlo Todo (Parte 3)

During the trip back from work to home I couldn't stop thinking and rethinking. What I had seen through the cameras in the afternoon was shocking, but I have to admit that part of me knew it was coming. Maybe not in that way or so soon, but part of me knew. As the collective went on and swayed, I thought about how to tell Sara everything, in a way that would shake her up once and for all and get her to abandon that permissive attitude she had with everything.

Although there was something deep inside my head that kept calling my attention to all this. Replaying in my head all the scenes of what I saw and everything I heard, there was something very strange. Something that didn't fit, like a piece in a puzzle that strangely overlapped or was missing.

Micaela had told Armando (and I clearly heard her) that she had called him to tell him what her mother said. That she said everything is fine. What did that mean? Did it mean Sara had told Mica to take care and be careful? I didn't know about the conversation they had in the morning, but I was sure I wasn't getting all the information about what was going on.

The more I got close to home, the more this doubt pressed me until finally I gave up my plan of confronting Sara. There was something missing from all this and I didn't want to be at a disadvantage in the possible discussion I would have with my partner. I decided to take things calmly, tell Sara if I had to, but not rush into it and see how everything developed.

When I arrived, Sara was already cooking and Mica was locked in her room, coming out only to eat, spend some time with us, and then go back to sleep since it was late. I noticed she was in a very good mood. Not so much with me, her treatment was normal, but she was in a very good mood with Sara. After eating, I made myself a coffee in silence, Sara lit up her daily joint and we put on... chatting in the kitchen, low so as not to wake up Mica.

I, love, I have to tell you what happened today with Mica..., I started, but she interrupted me.

Yes, already know, she said only, looking vaguely at the smoke from the joint.

What do you mean?

Mica already told me what happened. She already told me everything.

What? Seriously?, I replied surprised.

Of course, Marcos. If you know we tell each other everything. We don't have secrets between us, she responded with a hint of haughtiness.

And then?

And then what?

My brow furrowed automatically, How then that, Sara? Then what are we going to do?

She sighed and shook her head with a grimace, Come on with the let's. What are we going to do. We're not going to do anything, Marcos, I already explained. In any case, it should be me who has to do something, since I'm the mother.

Of course, I'm made of glass then. Invisible, I replied badly.

Ugh... come on... she protested and took another deep drag from her joint, I never said you're invisible, but you don't have to do anything because it doesn't concern you. It's Mica's life that is learning to develop as she wants, which is the best thing that can happen.

You didn't see what I saw, I replied again angry, trying not to raise my voice.

Sara looked at me for a while before answering, You're not obsessed, are you?

I turned around and faced her, What did you say?

That's what I said. Obsessed. Marcos, look, I see parents all the time in the consulting room, but I swear I've never found even the most closed-off and repressive father of his daughters so, but so interested in their sexual lives as I see you. And Mica isn't even your daughter, she told me. It almost made my blood boil.

Listen, what are you insinuating?!, I spat with anger, And what did you tell Mica this morning when they talked?

Sara protested softly and took another drag from her joint, Ugh... I'm not insinuating anything, love, just an observation...
I don't give a damn about your observation of shit, neither '... it happened to you. I cut her off. ... fine, okay. And what I told Mica in the morning is between us. Come on, silly! I growled at her, already getting impatient. Marcos..., she started. But I interrupted her. Tell me what you said to Mica! It's between us, Marcos! Give me a break! she defended herself, There are things between mother and daughter that have to stay in that intimate sphere. What does it matter what I told her? I want to know what you said because we had the same discussion last night. You promised you would talk to her to help her understand what happened with Armando in the kitchen, help her understand and stop it if necessary..., I started to unload, ...And then suddenly in two days we go from a blow job to that black guy's ass to him actually screwing her on his own bed! Sara jumped back, But come on, Marcos! What's wrong with you? Tell me what the hell you said!, I insisted. Finally, after a few seconds, she told me. She said they talked, that Mica told her about what happened with Armando in the kitchen that afternoon, that at first she was a little scared but then it had been very nice and she felt very excited with Armando. Sara told her she understood and that her feelings were normal and healthy. That she shouldn't feel guilty for feeling sexual attraction, since she was at an age when those feelings would start to emerge naturally. It was all part of growing up and becoming a woman. She also told her maybe Armando wasn't the ideal person, maybe the ideal thing is something more normal, some beginning of a relationship with someone of her own age. That's what's natural, but sometimes these things happen, like they had happened to her at one point, and sometimes you have to take what life gives you, not the ideal. She also told her to understand Armando and not judge him, that he was an older person who had grown up in a very macho environment and would sometimes have dominant and strong attitudes towards her. but as long as those attitudes pleased her, treat her well and don't hurt her there was nothing wrong with that in principle. She explained that men like Armando had to be understood and treated with patience, but they were not bad people in themselves.

I was about to blow a gasket listening to all that. I felt my veins pulsing on my forehead as Sara told me everything she'd said, but the worst part was saved for the end.

Sara said that finally she told Mica to take care of herself, that she was a smart girl and knew when a situation was bad, she knew how to recognize those situations. She also asked Mica how she felt about what had happened in the kitchen, and how she imagined it could continue, if Mica wanted it to or if it was just a one-time thing. Mica said she felt good, that she liked pleasing Armando a lot, that he'd excited her with things she'd never felt before, and if they gave it another try, she wanted to.

Sara said it was okay, but if the situation got more intense, take care and give her a packet of birth control pills Sara used. She told Mica to start taking them, just in case. Finally, she said they hugged smiling, had an excellent conversation, and that was the end of it.

She also told me that when Sara arrived home this afternoon after Armando's visit today, Mica sat with her very excited and happy, telling her everything that happened with Armando, and she was very happy about what happened. Sara asked if Armando had treated her well, if he hadn't hurt her beyond the natural pain of her first penetration, and it was then that Mica told her everything, apparently in great detail. Sara and Mica hugged each other, told each other they loved each other a lot, and after reminding Mica again to always be careful, Sara said she was very happy that Mica had enjoyed herself so much.

I was covering my face face with hands of pure rage and anger after listening to all this. I finally lost it.

But the word: pussy of your mother, Sara! The slut who gave birth to you!

Marcos!

You're a stupid one! I spat with anger, I can't believe it!

Sara also lost her temper and we started yelling at each other, You're a jerk! What's wrong with you?! You don't understand anything, idiot!

They screwed your daughter, stupid one! An old pervert screwed your 14-year-old daughter, tarada! React!

Dirty macho! I replied, They didn't screw Mica! Both of them did! We're not anyone's property to make us do things! Both wanted it, stupid! Why can't Mica enjoy and choose because she's a woman? Jerk!

I'm not sure if we woke up Mica with the tone of our discussion, but Sara got up and locked herself in our room with a slam, while I was left chewing on a terrible anger alone in the kitchen. It was our first strong discussion with insults since we were together with Sara and I think neither of us knew how to react. I tried to calm down and watch something low-key on TV, alone in the living room, until later after a couple of hours I slowly went to our room and got into bed next to Sara, who was already asleep.

That was a turning point in the whole story. That night, when I fought with Sara. From then on, everything changed. Our relationship became very distant, we started arguing about anything, whether related to Micaela and Armando or not, while we stopped having sex and sometimes even sleeping together. Many times I went to sleep on the couch, just to avoid any contact, physical or verbal. I was so mentally exhausted from the Micaela issue that I didn't feel strong enough for anything, just going to work, fulfilling the minimum possible and returning to a house that felt less mine every day.

And also around that date, it was when Armando started getting used to his new situation. Micaela would come home from school at 2 pm, already both of them... They knew that by around 14:30 or at the latest 15:00, Armando would be knocking on the door of his house and Mica would open it with a smile and a kiss. He usually stayed at home with Micaela until 16:00 or 16:30 and then left for his apartment upstairs or to do something else in the building. It seemed he didn't want to cross paths with me, for obvious reasons, but not with Sara either. That's how the days and weeks went by.

However, I started noticing certain behavior patterns as I made sure to check the house cameras every day from work. As the building manager, I saw Armando every Monday to Friday, but on Saturdays and Sundays, more than fulfilling his task of taking out the trash those days, he wouldn't be seen. He'd go somewhere with his wife, and I think Mica told Sara they were going to a house they had in the province, near Tortuguitas.

The truth is that I was sure Armando didn't have sex during weekends with his wife. It was impressive to see him arrive at his appointment at home on Mondays with Mica and how he almost pounced on her, which Mica adored, but also the force and sometimes even violence with which he took her those days. It was as if, whether by force or not, he had to save up weekends to release strong on Mondays with Micaela. And if for any reason of work or whatever, he couldn't go home on Monday and had to do it on Tuesday. Those Tuesdays, there were times when he would slap Micaela a bit while playing or half-serious about how rough he was, pulling her hair hard while they were having sex. That kind of thing. Micaela never complained, or at least never told Sara anything, and Armando never went too far enough to hurt her, but those days he was visibly more aggressive. It was almost a certainty that if he couldn't go on Monday, he'd grab Micaela on Tuesday and take her from behind, just to hear her scream in pain and pleasure. Another curious thing was that not everyone had sex every day Armando went. Some days Mica would only suck his cock, which was one of the things she loved most, other times she would only masturbate him and other times it wouldn't go any further than kissing and touching. Armando knew he had his slut, as he liked to call Mica, whenever he wanted, so he didn't lose hope in having sex with her every day.

But he also acquired some pretty nasty behaviors as he got used to going home. I remember one day, after having sex with Mica, when he was leaving and asked for money because he had to buy a drink. Mica gave him some of the money she had, but he asked for more and told her to look where Sara kept the money. Mica, not knowing the mistake she was making, went with him to our room and checked in the drawer. While counting the money from the wallet he found, Armando took everything and put it in his pocket, telling Mica not to say anything. When Mica protested about the money he took, he sat her down on the edge of our bed, unbuttoned his pants and forced her to suck his cock and swallow all his cum, telling her that if she wanted to keep having sex with him, she should be quiet. Mica obeyed gladly and never protested again when Armando directly came home and took money from the drawer.

His comfort in our house also led him to start drinking. Sometimes he would grab one of our wines, open it and drink straight from the bottle, sitting on our couch, watching TV. Sometimes hugging Mica, looking at her with her, and other times with the girl kneeling in front of him, of course sucking his cock while his rough hand caressed her head. A couple of times he gave Mica a drink, either while they were talking or having sex, as if to encourage her to do something else.

Sara was completely out of it, in her own cloud of psychological farts, in which nothing was inherently bad, everything was perspective and you had to try to understand behaviors. If Micaela was happy, then she was happy and the problematic one was always me.

Micaela also changed quite a bit at this time and stopped seeming like a little girl, even though I still thought of her that way. She changed her way of dressing, starting to wear shorter and more revealing clothes with tight fabrics that accentuated her hips and butt. She also began to lightly makeup, something she never really did before. She never told Sara if Armando was the one who excited her about getting dressed like that or if it was her own initiative to impress and please Armando. The thing is that Micaela would often get ready when coming home from school, just to receive Armando.

Sometimes I didn't even look at the cameras from work anymore. I stopped doing it regularly (I did it several times a day), because I noticed it was depressing me more and more the more I looked.

One afternoon, however, nothing much was going on at work and something sparked in me like they say. I knew Micaela had an extra activity at school that day, so I was going to do double shift that day and wouldn't be home at my usual time. And it also happened that Sara wasn't going to the consultation that day, preferring to stay home to advance her work quietly and without distractions. Something occurred to me. And if...? I was sure Armando would go home like almost every afternoon. And what happened when he found Sara instead of Micaela?

I connected and put on my small headphones, determined not to miss anything, no matter how boring it might be. And honestly, it was boring. It became 2:00 pm and Armando didn't appear, I only saw Sara cooking something, eating, reading and writing on some papers she had on the kitchen table, nothing more. By 2:30 pm, everything was still... Okay. But at 15 minus 10, when I was already about to leave my vigilance due to pure boredom, I saw Armando coming out of the elevator on our floor, heading towards our door and knocking as always.

Luckily, I could hear everything since they were right under the entrance hall camera. Sara opened the door and greeted him with a smile.

Ah, hi Armando, how are you?

Armando looked disoriented, didn't expect to find Sara at home, Ah... hi Sara... good evening..., eeeh...

Did you come to see Micaela? She's not here

Yes... eeeh... uh... well...

Sara smiled and let him in. Why?, I thought, But come on, Armando, take a minute? I wanted to talk to you.

Sure? Don't want to bother...

But it's no trouble, come on., she said, and the two of them headed to the kitchen. Armando sat down at the table and Sara also, on the other side.

You know what, Sara... ehh.. I love..., began Armando, but Sara cut him off immediately with a sweet smile that could melt anyone.

No, look Armando, don't worry. I'm not angry or going to yell at you or anything. I already know what you're going to say. It's about Micaela, right?

Yes, look Sara... she told me several times that everything was fine, wasn't it? And I believe her, but then how is this?, began Armando while Sara listened attentively.

If so, I imagine, oh dear, would you like a coffee? I'll make one?, asked Sara getting up and going towards the stoves.

Good, thanks. If you're going to..., said Armando and I'm not sure if it was just my impression, but it seemed to me that he was looking at her fixedly, in the same way he looked at Micaela that first time, which was actually the same gaze he gave all the women he liked.

While Sara prepared the coffee she lit a joint, turned around and showed it to Armando, Oh, don't mind it, no? I smoke these.

Armando smiled and made a gesture, Nah, Sara, if it's your place. Take it easy, don't bother me.

You don't smoke these? From marijuana, I mean, she said Uh, no. When I was a dude, yes, now I'm not. Sara smiled at him, Well if you want to ask me, okay? I have a lot. Finally Sara served the two coffees and sat back down at the table, Well, look Armando, I wanted... Call me 'you', laughed Armando interrupting her, So many years here in the building already. Sara smiled, Okay, you're right. Besides your relationship now with Micaela, well, it's better to use the informal form of address. Anyway, you know that I'm a psychologist and therapist, don't you?, she said as Armando nodded and took a sip of coffee, So, I assure you that I've seen everything and it doesn't impress or bother me much. I'm more about... living and letting live, see? Not judging, no prejudices of any kind and of course helping people. Of course, replied Armando. Then, regarding Micaela, stay calm. Seriously. I already know everything that happened and everything that's happening. I know because she tells me. Armando seemed to worry, Uh... do you tell her everything? Well, almost everything. There are very intimate things that don't go there. And it's okay. We all have a private inner life, even girls like Micaela, who need to be respected. I don't interfere unless she tells me or if I see something bad or dangerous happening. And you think there's something bad or dangerous here?, asked Armando. To which Sara just shook her head and smiled. No, not at all. Micaela is happy with what she's experiencing, which is new for her. I see her happy, content, growing. As a person and as a woman, no? I think you're doing very well, said Armando, Yes, okay, sure it's an unusual situation, given their ages. It's not normal. But many girls need a masculine figure in their lives, especially during formation periods. You know that Micaela's biological father... isn't Marcos, the one who lives here, he hasn't been around for many years, when she was little, and it's good that now she has that figure masculine present.

Armando took more coffee and seemed to think about what he was going to say next, taking his time and looking at her fixedly at Sara.

Sara, 'let me... we have' confidence, don't we? I mean... can we talk?, asked Armando.

Of course, Armando!, she smiled at him, We can talk about anything, about what you want, and since we already have confidence., Sara seemed to be psychoanalyzing him, whether she wanted to or not.

Well, look. What I don't want are problems., said Armando, Yes, it's fine, you're not bothered that I'm with the girl. I understood. But I don't want a big problem', knows'. I mean a big problem' like going crazy. Let's see if by being with the girl suddenly something happens and the one who falls is me....

What's going to happen, Armando?

I mean that the girl might say something to someone, or she might say something in school and then it's over, done.',

No, what's she going to say?, answered Sara, First of all, I already told her that this is something private between you two and nobody else. And secondly, I explained that since this is... unusual, let's say, it would be better if she didn't say anything or mention it to anyone. If she has any problem or it bothers her, she should tell me and nobody else.

Something else...

Yes, tell me., invited Sara while kissing his pipe.

Armando seemed to interrupt himself and look at her for a second, You know what? Don't give me one of those? Let's try, what the hell.... They both laughed and Sara went back to the room, returning with a fairly long pipe that she gave to Armando while looking for his lighter.

Ah, but look how good, laughed Armando.

Sara smiled proudly, See? I smoke good stuff.

Armando accepted Sara's fire and gave her two dry ones, Ufff... does this work?

Of course. What were you going to say?,

That's good... if we have confidence... I'm not one to get involved, but 'it's so rare' this is. How can it not bother you that I'm with the girl?, asked Armando looking at her fixedly while they smoked.

Ay, Armando. If you tell me like that, it bothers me..., said Sara. I speak like that. I didn't mean to offend.
Don't worry, everything is fine, Sara replied, And honestly, being honest, can I make a confession? Sara waited while Armando nodded his head, I'm not bothered because I also had encounters with an older man when I was a girl, so I understand and it's lovely how it can be.
Seriously?, asked Armando, But how old were you, if you don't mind...
Sara smiled, I'm 37.
Armando laughed, Fah... you're a kid. You don't look like it. You're really good.
Sara laughed happily and gave her porro another puff, Oh, Armando, thank you. It's always nice to hear that.
See, said Armando while continuing with the porro and coffee, From where did you get to the building where I picked you up. Seriously. I said it must be a cutie. She must be a bomb.
Oh, but how many years ago was that?, asked Sara.
And... eleven, twelve years easy. From when you moved here.
Uy, then you were really a kid, laughed Sara.

The two maintained a brief moment of silence where they seemed to look at each other, both smoking and taking their coffee. Sara appeared to be inspecting Armando, perhaps from her psychological perspective or perhaps in another way, while Armando had the gaze and behavior he already knew. He was checking out Sara and his eyes inevitably strayed to the little cleavage that showed under her blouse. It was Armando who finally broke the silence they were sharing.

I, and your husband, what does he say about the topic of the kid? Knows, doesn't he?, asked the old man
Sara nodded, He knows, and it's not my husband. We're not married.
Ah, no?, said Armando while adjusting a bit in his chair, I thought if...
Sara shook her head, No, we're not married. And Marcos... is all a topic, like they say.
Why?
I don't know, it's not relevant, Armando.
It happened something? Because if he knows I'm going to want to kick him in the balls..., said Armando without knowing how true that was.
Marcos isn't that type of guy, don't worry., she said. Sara, 'Knows, and it doesn't like what's happening, but I already told him it's not his problem. Several times. Micaela's mom is me, not him.

But look if he reports me..., argued Armando.

Sara bit her lip disdainfully, What's that guy going to report? For God's sake. Stay calm, nothing's going to happen, he's a wimp. It's not worth making a fuss. He gets angry, but see how the saying goes... dog that barks..., finished Sara shrugging.

But everything's okay? Between you two, I mean...

Sara kept silent for a moment and then answered, No, honestly, things aren't going well right now. We're fighting a lot, arguing, in short... difficulties of the couple.

What a shame, I...

Those are things that happen to all couples. You must also argue with your wife

No, I mean what a shame that a cutie like you is with someone like him, said Armando, looking at her.

Sara was surprised and kept looking at him, How?

And so, it fights, it treats me badly, doesn't pay attention to me..., said Armando while smoking.

Wait, I never said he treated me badly..., replied Sara.

Armando smiled, If he doesn't pay attention to you then he's treating you badly.

Sara looked at him fixedly and swallowed her saliva, examining Armando for a long time while smoking. Who knows what she was thinking. Finally, she said, Well... eh... we're getting off track. In short, seriously Armando, stay calm about the girl, nothing's going to happen as long as she doesn't get hurt.

Armando nodded, Okay, Sara. If you know he treats her well, like she likes it. He pays attention to her and she pays attention to him.

Yes, I already know, said Sara

What does she tell you?

Ah, that's personal stuff, Armando..., laughed Sara.

Tell me something, even if it's just for curiosity's sake... Armando laughed with her.

Sara thought for a moment and then said, That she feels very desired all the time. That you're very strong, and dominant. You make her feel full and like a real woman... that's really good. She smiled happily, Seh... she also, it's a doll. And she likes it very much, eh?

Now it was Sara's turn to exhibit a sarcastic smile, Ah, if? And what does she like?

Armando laughed, Pará... wasn't all that private?

Sara smiled and rested her chin on her elbow, leaning in to pay more attention, Come on, tell me, just curious..., she said, retorting what Armando had answered.

'Cause it's not going to please you', Sara. Talk like I do... it will make you sick for sure.

Sara continued smiling and looking at him fixedly, Let's make an exception then. I promise it won't make me sick.

Armando made a pause, looking at her fixedly also, tapping his fingers on the table while thinking.

The little one loves sucking my cock. It drives her crazy.

Sara seemed not to be very affected, Ah, if? I think I already knew that... something told me...

Armando nodded, Maybe... she likes it a lot like I have it, seems. And the truth is that your little one makes me very hard always., and as a reflexive act, he lowered his hand and adjusted the bulge on his pants.

Look at you..., Sara only managed to say, with her gaze between fixed and lost in Armando, What else?

Armando thought for another moment and continued, She likes it when I come in her mouth... ah... in that little mouth she has. She likes swallowing it when I'm done.... eeeh... the truth is that your little one likes it when I come anywhere..., he laughed.

Yes, obviously that's what she likes, already told me, smiled Sara.

She likes it when I give it to her hard, also...

Ah? That one didn't know..., said Sara.

Armando nodded, Seeeh... I love it, and so does she. girl, viteh, I don't know how she can stand it like I have it, but she takes it.

Sara laughed and put out her porro after giving it a last puff, Ay, well, I think we're getting too carried away... let's change the subject.

No, knew that Sara..., said Armando standing up, I'm going, I have something to do'. thanks for the chat, for the coffee and the joint.

Sara laughed and accompanied him. until the hallcito, No problem, Armando, whenever you want, okay? I loved the chat and it's good that we cleared things up and you stay calm

They stopped in the hallcito while giving each other a goodbye kiss on the cheek, but when Sara managed to open the door, Armando put his hand out to stop her Ah, for me, one thing ma'... I forgot...

What?

In confidence no? Between you and me?, he asked looking at her fixedly and lowering his voice slightly.

Sara did the same, Yes, tell me...

Armando approached her and put a hand gently on Sara's waist, which she didn't seem to misinterpret and let him do it. 'Cuchame... since we're in confidence, if you ever need someone to attend to you... or anything else, just say so?

Sara's eyes opened wide and she looked at him fixedly for a moment, But Armando what are you saying?

Armando stopped her, I'm not saying anything, I'm only saying that. If we're in confidence, we're in confidence. That's why I'm telling you. If you ever need something, just say so.

But you're Mica's boyfriend, Armando, Sara replied

Armando approached her a little more and without being very strong or rough, made Sara feel the presence of his bulky body closer to hers, rubbing against her and making her lean against the wall No, Sara, 'cuchame... I'm not anyone's boyfriend, lying? I'm the guy who gets your daughter. And she likes it. And if the other guy who's with you tells me that he's not your husband, then I've told you, when you need something, just say so...

Sara swallowed again, looking at him fixedly, Armando, I don't know...

The old man interrupted her, Do you know how much fun your daughter has with what I have here? Eh? Did she tell you? Do you know the screams she lets out, I have to cover her mouth so we don't have a commotion with the neighbors. She tells me it makes her feel good, and if it does, then I'll take care of her well. Look. There's not just one who needs a guy in serious who can screw her really well. That's why... when you need something, just say so.

Get out, Armando., Sara managed to say to him. She looked quite disturbed by what she had just heard. 'Seh, I'd better go.', said Armando and gave her a long kiss on the cheek that Sara didn't avoid. Armando left, Sara closed the door and saw her stay in the hall, taking one hand to her chest and recovering the breath she had been holding for a while. I did nothing but, tired of seeing things get worse and worse, I just turned off my phone and stopped watching.

6 comentários - Perderlo Todo (Parte 3)

Espero que a tu ex le hayan cancelado la licencia. Tenías bastante evidencia para separarte y denunciarlos. Lo único que faltó fue hablar con alguien más, fuera del sistema.
Que exitante y morboso a la vez. No se si es verdad aunque en el primer relato dijiste que era real, si es asi, vos tenias que denunciar todo esta ya que mica es menor aunque no eras el padre biologico, pero eras su padrastro y eso vale. Mal por la madre ya que ella una profesional, encima una sicóloga trabajando de su profecion y no hacer nada con la hija y aconsejandole mal. Si es fantacia te hace volar la cabeza, ambas. Van puntos