First thanks to the People of Poringa.Net who are helping me get 'certified'. Total thanks for the patience.
In my year of 55, many things passed like I was counting. I motivated myself to do them that year. I became a habitué of Sweet Club, met an escort and we were negotiating with a couple so that the lady would go out with the respective husband of the other couple in established dates.
And this that I'm going to tell you definitely was a total mess. That's it, I don't lie to the reader, there is no sex story, but it explains many things that I'll narrate later, I hope you laugh while reading!!!!!
The next story is ordered like a short story, with subtitles and an indicator of music to listen to while reading.
Mia is on my side correcting the text and adding things I had forgotten, we're crying from laughter and in the office they don't understand what's going on. MIA SHOUTS LET'S PUT MUSIC AT EACH SUBTITLE !!!!!!! We've passed 5 years since we met.THE COCKTAIL: Read with this theme: ZZ Top - La Grange (Live From Gruene Hall)
As all the years the company where I work part time organized its end of year cocktail event. An event that my partner loves, there he finds the elite of sandwiches and various things more that end up in his stomach and as the strict schedule is from 7 to 9 pm, afterwards he can keep eating. I tell him that's his babysitting day, load of everything. That's what it is, dear readers. Or reader.
All employees, managers, and their wives dressed to show everyone they are the royalty of the company. I estimate that many of these ladies go to see or guess who their husbands are with.
The ladies love my husband, especially the wife of the firm's owner. Fernando makes a personal waiter, goes back and forth with the tray, half of it he eats himself at a speed that always surprises me. The waiters laugh at him. They put some in his pocket as they organize a tip collection for the service.
Once he threatened with a personal strip tease, they put out the lights so no one could see it haha.
My partner and the ladies are strange in this world of employees, where almost everyone knows each other, those ladies play visitors.
The year I turned 55, the ladies got an employee, a kind of junior manager, to assist them. No more than 35 years old, with a long skirt uniform, white buttoned shirt up to the double cuff for twins (that put my husband on radar) and airline-style handkerchief, black tights and stilettos without heels, hair tied back and design glasses, not flashy but coquettish. Always dressed the same way every day at work, almost invisible, named Mía, divorced with two twin toddlers.
Mía would see my husband going and coming. At one point, the pack of ladies moved to the balcony for a smoke. I see the waiter puffing on his mini Montecristo that he shares with the manager. Ehhhhhhh.
The ladies coexisted in this scene and I I'm approaching in missile alert mode here it re-counts I fart at drumbeats. When I arrive, Mía, my wife, pulls out another little cigar, lights it, hands it to me and I start sharing it with this lady. The lady of the company's owner comes up and says in Dutch -a pleasure, this is for Fernando, I hope he doesn't get annoyed-, I also thank her in that language while chewing glass. It was wrapped in a very fine paper with a beautiful bow.
The ladies left, I thought it was to gawk, like an invitee and two employees sharing two cigars. I didn't care about three damn things, I wanted to know what the hell was going on or had gone wrong with my partner's mess. But no, the perfect distance lady. When we finished the cigar she said -I'm going back to work-.
I stayed with Fernando to threaten him with a look and he always puts that face -oh, now I did it-. -Don't you think you got one of those young ones?. –No- he said, looking at the box and the guy tries to take it from my hands and I pretend to throw it out the window. The ladies were watching, amused. I stayed for a while with my arm extended holding the box that was pointing at nothing and Fernando looking up at the height the box could fall from. Everyone was observing the scene.
End of the cocktail party, we left, him with two full trays and he said -all alone for pussy- and Pumper Nic's figure came to mind, the hippopotamus!!!. I wasn't letting go of the box, where I was breaking my balls because it was being thrown away and they were filming me with their phone, good cell.
THE TRIP:
When we're leaving the company's garage I see this lady standing at the building entrance. I tell the hippopotamus -come closer to see what's wrong with her-. ERROR.
She says she's waiting for a taxi because she lives nearby. I say: take it, we'll give you a ride. SECOND ERROR. Where are we going? I ask, -go down Libertador until Lafinur-, no longer addressing him familiarly. Does this lady live on Libertador and Lafinur? Ah, good.
When we arrive, he says to the driver/husband/partner/hippopotamus and others, park here and we're going to take a coffee (I think this silly woman won't ask if we want). I don't know why I said -Come on-, well, since it was with a massive fart. THIRD ERROR.CONFISERIE: Shania Twain - Man! I Feel Like A WomanWe enter, the boys greet her, my husband removes the chair from me and she stands there waiting for the one who is with me to do the same. Already seated, she unbuttons the collar of her shirt, untangles her hair, and swings it around, my husband was making a reverend-looking fool of himself looking at something or other, that's just how he was. He takes out the cufflinks from his shirt and raises his fists, doesn't fold them or roll them up. He tells Fernando, You still haven't gotten your gift, I chose it myself. The girl is buying what was in that box.
My husband's brain was flat, but incredibly he asks, Is this shirt from Saville Row?, to which Fernando responds, Yes, it's from Hutsman, and my husband gets up and sits next to her, starts touching the fabric and examines the collar construction. She wasn't taking her eyes off me and I wanted to yell at that fool -Get your hands out of there and sit back down beside me, you're a worn-out, used-up, floating piece of junk headed for the coast of Japan but wrecked on the Cape of Good Hope, but no, I held her gaze with a face like I'm looking at a fool.
She was staring at my shirt. Is it a Kathryn Sargent? she asks. Yes, I say, and the idiot points out that mine is an Arrow (150 euros but bought in a discount store in Brussels for 30 with a defect). Mia looks at me and says, You're not very attractive.
And suddenly Mia puts her hand on her leg, then Fernando told me he didn't touch Carlito but Carlito made ping, ping, ping, that annoying onomatopoeic sound. And what the hell is this slut doing? She's just standing there by herself, and now what do I say or do (the café was well-lit with people) and if this crazy woman causes a scene?.
Nothing at all, Mía kept looking at me and my husband touched her shoulder and she observed him curiously. Fernando tells her to unbutton two more buttons, Mía obeys. that I had done the same thing. He says something in his ear and she didn't loosen up with her gaze. What the hell is going on here. Three gin tonics were holding back my impulse to get up and yell at him, more than sure if I did it would fall asleep on the floor, snoring.
Mia sighs and tells me -I just want to see how they screw-. Silence.
But if they're not interested, we'll finish our coffee and go our separate ways- he says to Fernando. Total silence. Fernando starts laughing –what are you laughing at, jerk- I say, -what the hell do you want me to laugh about, this woman wants to see us screw like two nothing-burglars, always the same thin one, you're a piece of shit-. Mia calmly replies -I've always wanted to see them screw, but there was no situation to tell them-.
As drunk as I was, I couldn't understand what she wanted to be stupid.
Fernando asks –listen, is there a hotel around here where we can go? -There's an apart- and he interrupts, -no, apart no, hotel, because I'm going to show you how the lady does it-. I'm in a confitería with a girl I knew from work who wants to see me screw?
I wanted to say something and Fernando raised his index finger, crossed his arms. Not much time later, Mia told me about Fernando, that stupid Fernando.
I was olympically drunk, good exactly quite drunk, it didn't matter in that situation, and my husband tells Mia -listen, grab the phone, find out where we're going, -you call the waiter and pay, I order-, she answers -you'll see when the hangover passes, jerk-.
When the waiter approaches I hand him the card, look at Mia's hand, her regular client, almost leaning on my partner's shoulder, I can't say it any other way. The girl didn't move, was concentrated on the cell phone she was handling with one hand -it's ready, find one-. Fernando got up, pulled out my chair and didn't move to do the same with Mia. That's if he put his hand in her ass and took her out of the confitería. He takes it from my arm, I left alone, that's right with the gift, I would only hand it over if I was dead or asleep.
I don't know what to say, I was feeling weak, what was going to happen was going to happen, but I didn't want Fernando to leave. I don't know why I saw him so masculine, never imagined Fernando would do what he did, they'll call it a fool. Let's go to the truck, he opens the door and doesn't do it with Mía who was quiet, he says - unless you want to come down, I'm staying with this young lady -. I didn't get out.THE JOURNEY: MammaMia - Abba/u]
Starts and tells Mía,-take off your pants-, Mía does it and we stop at a red light, my husband turns around and rips off the thong. Mía doesn't say anything, green, we leave, I turn around and tell Mia,-please tell me you're okay, this could end here without drama and nothing will happen?. -Yes, I'm very well, with you guys I'm very safe (and who knows us to know who we are), I always see how your partner is going to come looking for you and they leave holding hands (but what a pain in the butt, that doesn't mean anything, I think).
My husband puts on his underwear on his face (and where did he get it from), looks at me, rolls down the window and throws away the thong, Mía laughs, I turn around and tell her,-it was already very worn out. Almost threw the gift away. These are two sorets like that for anyone and they're even connected from who knows where hell.
Fernando was taken, but very controlled, good, that's what I thought. He asks me again, do you want to get off? I can't respond because he tells Mía,-and you, what do we do?. -I don't want to get off- Mia responds. I hug the box so hard I flatten my hairdo. Fernando says –get a grip, young lady-. I respond –don't even think about mistreating her-. He says –dear, I'm going to take you and not touch her even in passing-.
I had my heart racing, wasn't ashamed or anything that seemed like it, was scared. Mia tells me -are you sure you want to go to the hotel-. Siiiiii she says,-I'm very but very drunk but very but very good-. Two drunks and a monkey with scissors driving.
Fernando tells me –take off her thong and give it- I react “what thong if I'm in my underwear did you tell me to go in my underwear, what's wrong with you, you're crazy”, he laughs the son of a slut. He brakes and says-and get out-, “but you're crazy, what's going on, what are you thinking we are”. Mía touches the man and says quietly,-please pay attention-.
I didn't even think about telling him no, down, Mia opens the door, approaches and puts her hands on my shoulders, the daughter of a slut was enjoying herself and I was coked up, recontracagada. If someone touched my tit, I'd use the word: pussy or they'd be kissing my ass goodnight. Nothing. I lowered the window a bit and saw her hair floating when the air came in, spectacular, needed fresh air, just realized I was really drunk bad. Fernando looked through the rearview mirror.
We stopped again at the traffic light, and I see some guys looking at the truck. The jerk lowers the windows and yells at the dudes, What a night, folks, I'm going to screw two chicks, the dudes honk their horns and Mia laughs. What a lovely jerk is Fernando, Mia says softly.
Mia, are you turned on? I ask, -No, I'm happy screams-. Happy? Go figure out what we ended up doing and this slut tells me I'm happy.
Fernando says, -Mía always the lady puts an excuse, one but here, another but there, I'm 55 and at her age, it'll occur to her when she's 80 to make a trio and the worst is that I'll be dead-. My bombón made me laugh. Mia says, -Today you're okay because we're three-. Fernando starts honking his horn.
I took her to Club Sweet, Fernando tells –we're swingers, it totally interrupts him- No dear, since 40, I propose going first to Anchorena, surely this daughter of a slut will denounce us and close the place-When I debuted at Club Sweet, he interrupts me again and says -I want to know, take me-. We were all laughing so hard. What a crazy cutie, good crazier than me.
I kept thinking, where did this young lady come from that she wants to see us screw?. She's totally crazy in the head. Not much could coordinate, I knew I wasn't going to vomit, not even broken in two, luckily. Always take it at the end of each reunion, a lot, quickly, total mess afterwards.
We had been right, we saw and were seen screwing at Club Sweet. The second time we went, Fernando stopped on the round bed and started eating my cock and the daughter of a slut says, -but strong, suck my cock like you suck it to your husband, the groans cut off for five seconds. Literal.
What a difference from my 30s, kids, buying a house, working to pay everything, working, working, grad school and all the crap you eat to get into university with more crap people. But I was programming myself that year of my 55-year-old piranhas. Fernando always told me reset, sweetie, and then change Windows.The hotel: Pretty Woman - Ray Orbison and Heart of Glass – Blondie.He made Mía pay for the hotel room and breakfast. When we entered the room, he told her at first -Mía put yourself in balls, go to the wall, support your hands, spread your legs-. -Give me your lip liner-, she asked, I have labial lipstick, I respond, Mía says -I have ROUGE (that pronunciation)-. Ehhh, what's going to happen here?. Maybe he'll stick it up his ass. I started laughing and couldn't stop, the two of them turned around and also started laughing, I wanted to tell Mia -they're going to screw you in the ass- but couldn't finish the sentence.
I was out of breath, coughing, laughing, pointing my finger at Mia's ass with mine, still out of breath, coughing, and laughing until I said -I'm about to pee-. I ran to the bathroom, and they're looking at me worriedly, trying to aim for my fat ass (I have big hips) in the toilet, Fernando shouting something on the video, I fell down and couldn't stop laughing but very choked up, my lungs and ribs hurt.
Fernando was hugging me with my inhaler next to me, yelling -crazy, crazy, I'm getting scared-. He was being my boyfriend again, that one who doesn't want anything to happen to me. I looked at him and said -you're not going to put the lip liner in his ass- and we all burst out laughing again. I don't know how long it took until I stopped laughing. I told Mia -he wants to paint your butt, but Fernando wasn't laughing, but Mia was turning red from laughing so much, we looked at each other and started laughing again.
After a while, Fernando asked where the lip liner was, Mia looked at him with a face like -it's in my purse-, he opened it and threw everything on the bed, didn't find the Rouge, I gave it to him and tried to open it, -how do you open this thing-. We started laughing again when we saw him trying to get the rouge out of its packaging, Fernando said -what are these idiots laughing at-, with Mía we couldn't stop and Mía was shouting -I want to see them having sex-. I went back and forth from the bathroom with Mia who followed me and told me -that one, the other-. videt o the toilet.
I say to -Mia we take shampoo?-. Fernando sees me grab the bottle and yells at me, -long hair the bottle you're going to pull out an eye with the cork-, Mia and I start laughing, I throw myself on the floor hugging the bottle, start kicking the floor, Mia lying next to me and suddenly, the bottle corks and we both get soaked. I had ruined Fernando's night.
Fernando takes us to the bathroom floating one of each arm and says, -you sit here and you there-,
Mia says -no I don't want where Clara is- and I yell -I don't want where Mia is-. Fernando is laughing and orders: -stop, silence, these two are such a bunch of idiots that no one can get them out of anywhere-.
It got worse, I started yelling –it's not like Carlito-.Mía stops laughing and asks who Carlito is and I jump on the bed screaming “Carlito is the cock, Carlito is the cock”.
Mia goes to the bathroom and wants Fernando to wrap her up like a mummy with toilet paper, but Fernando keeps pushing her until she sits down and says –enough of this crap-. We put them in the bathtub to see if they can pass the time.
Fernando tries to make the jets work and one shot hits him on the forehead, soaked he turns around to see if we saw what happened, and we start laughing again with our finger pointing at his face.
When I finally fill the tub, Mia is already naked and I take off my clothes as fast as I can. Fernando undresses and leaves her so neat that Mia yells –hurry, hurry-, but he puts on boxers. Mia yells –I want to meet Carlito the little bird-, Fernando gives in, takes off his boxers and Mia says –Mierdaaaaaaaaaaaapero what a son of a slut - I ask her –can you handle your pot like that spoon?-. We start laughing again.
Fernando had the ice bucket in his hand in case we vomited, which didn't happen.
Mia wanted to put the cock in the ice bucket, tried to take it from him, Fernando stood up with his arms raised - He held the cooler, at that moment Mia lowered my boxers, grabbed my cock and said –BUT WHAT A GOOD PIERCING FOR SIGNING THE MEMOS- . I looked at her tits and they were dancing so much because I was laughing. It had been like a whole life since I laughed that much.
Another scandal was when we got kicked out, I left quietly and went to bed. Fernando told me to hydrate as much as possible. The sounds of Mia's tantrums in the bathroom could be heard when Fernando tried to take her away, until silence, she appeared making fun of Fernando, singing and excuse me if I offended “San Lorenzo’s March” and parading around the room.
At one point she stopped talking and told Fernando –I want to unsheathe my corvo cock-, you don't have it responded Fernando -, -oh no look how I pull it out and try to grab her cock-. I wasn't laughing anymore, I was scared it would fall off, break its hip and we'd have to take it out of the hotel in an ambulance, we'd be leaving in a TRIO FALLING ELDERLY WHEN HE WAS MAKING UPA TO A YOUNG WOMAN AND THE background music.
I managed to calm her down and put her next to me, Fernando brought over a bottle of water and Mia said –take a little sip and show me the bird-. Five sips, five times that Fernando took off his boxers, the last time with his index finger starting to give her taps and the bird was moving from side to side. Enough said Fernando –it's not for playing-, Mia stuck out her tongue and said –and what's Carlito for?- We laughed again.
After that, Mia leaned on my shoulder and started snoring, I did too. Fernando didn't sleep because he was scared we'd vomit and choke.
The next morning when we were having breakfast, Mia took the box and said “you deserve it”. I couldn't ask her where they met because Mia asked me: -if you don't mind, can I spend Saturday and Sunday with you-. I looked at her and said –the apartment is small, but come on-. That wasn't a mistake.Definitely Mia had entered our lives.
This short story closes with Sandie Shaw - Puppet On A String.
In my year of 55, many things passed like I was counting. I motivated myself to do them that year. I became a habitué of Sweet Club, met an escort and we were negotiating with a couple so that the lady would go out with the respective husband of the other couple in established dates.
And this that I'm going to tell you definitely was a total mess. That's it, I don't lie to the reader, there is no sex story, but it explains many things that I'll narrate later, I hope you laugh while reading!!!!!
The next story is ordered like a short story, with subtitles and an indicator of music to listen to while reading.
Mia is on my side correcting the text and adding things I had forgotten, we're crying from laughter and in the office they don't understand what's going on. MIA SHOUTS LET'S PUT MUSIC AT EACH SUBTITLE !!!!!!! We've passed 5 years since we met.THE COCKTAIL: Read with this theme: ZZ Top - La Grange (Live From Gruene Hall)
As all the years the company where I work part time organized its end of year cocktail event. An event that my partner loves, there he finds the elite of sandwiches and various things more that end up in his stomach and as the strict schedule is from 7 to 9 pm, afterwards he can keep eating. I tell him that's his babysitting day, load of everything. That's what it is, dear readers. Or reader.
All employees, managers, and their wives dressed to show everyone they are the royalty of the company. I estimate that many of these ladies go to see or guess who their husbands are with.
The ladies love my husband, especially the wife of the firm's owner. Fernando makes a personal waiter, goes back and forth with the tray, half of it he eats himself at a speed that always surprises me. The waiters laugh at him. They put some in his pocket as they organize a tip collection for the service.
Once he threatened with a personal strip tease, they put out the lights so no one could see it haha.
My partner and the ladies are strange in this world of employees, where almost everyone knows each other, those ladies play visitors.
The year I turned 55, the ladies got an employee, a kind of junior manager, to assist them. No more than 35 years old, with a long skirt uniform, white buttoned shirt up to the double cuff for twins (that put my husband on radar) and airline-style handkerchief, black tights and stilettos without heels, hair tied back and design glasses, not flashy but coquettish. Always dressed the same way every day at work, almost invisible, named Mía, divorced with two twin toddlers.
Mía would see my husband going and coming. At one point, the pack of ladies moved to the balcony for a smoke. I see the waiter puffing on his mini Montecristo that he shares with the manager. Ehhhhhhh.
The ladies coexisted in this scene and I I'm approaching in missile alert mode here it re-counts I fart at drumbeats. When I arrive, Mía, my wife, pulls out another little cigar, lights it, hands it to me and I start sharing it with this lady. The lady of the company's owner comes up and says in Dutch -a pleasure, this is for Fernando, I hope he doesn't get annoyed-, I also thank her in that language while chewing glass. It was wrapped in a very fine paper with a beautiful bow.
The ladies left, I thought it was to gawk, like an invitee and two employees sharing two cigars. I didn't care about three damn things, I wanted to know what the hell was going on or had gone wrong with my partner's mess. But no, the perfect distance lady. When we finished the cigar she said -I'm going back to work-.
I stayed with Fernando to threaten him with a look and he always puts that face -oh, now I did it-. -Don't you think you got one of those young ones?. –No- he said, looking at the box and the guy tries to take it from my hands and I pretend to throw it out the window. The ladies were watching, amused. I stayed for a while with my arm extended holding the box that was pointing at nothing and Fernando looking up at the height the box could fall from. Everyone was observing the scene.
End of the cocktail party, we left, him with two full trays and he said -all alone for pussy- and Pumper Nic's figure came to mind, the hippopotamus!!!. I wasn't letting go of the box, where I was breaking my balls because it was being thrown away and they were filming me with their phone, good cell.
THE TRIP:
When we're leaving the company's garage I see this lady standing at the building entrance. I tell the hippopotamus -come closer to see what's wrong with her-. ERROR.
She says she's waiting for a taxi because she lives nearby. I say: take it, we'll give you a ride. SECOND ERROR. Where are we going? I ask, -go down Libertador until Lafinur-, no longer addressing him familiarly. Does this lady live on Libertador and Lafinur? Ah, good.
When we arrive, he says to the driver/husband/partner/hippopotamus and others, park here and we're going to take a coffee (I think this silly woman won't ask if we want). I don't know why I said -Come on-, well, since it was with a massive fart. THIRD ERROR.CONFISERIE: Shania Twain - Man! I Feel Like A WomanWe enter, the boys greet her, my husband removes the chair from me and she stands there waiting for the one who is with me to do the same. Already seated, she unbuttons the collar of her shirt, untangles her hair, and swings it around, my husband was making a reverend-looking fool of himself looking at something or other, that's just how he was. He takes out the cufflinks from his shirt and raises his fists, doesn't fold them or roll them up. He tells Fernando, You still haven't gotten your gift, I chose it myself. The girl is buying what was in that box.
My husband's brain was flat, but incredibly he asks, Is this shirt from Saville Row?, to which Fernando responds, Yes, it's from Hutsman, and my husband gets up and sits next to her, starts touching the fabric and examines the collar construction. She wasn't taking her eyes off me and I wanted to yell at that fool -Get your hands out of there and sit back down beside me, you're a worn-out, used-up, floating piece of junk headed for the coast of Japan but wrecked on the Cape of Good Hope, but no, I held her gaze with a face like I'm looking at a fool.
She was staring at my shirt. Is it a Kathryn Sargent? she asks. Yes, I say, and the idiot points out that mine is an Arrow (150 euros but bought in a discount store in Brussels for 30 with a defect). Mia looks at me and says, You're not very attractive.
And suddenly Mia puts her hand on her leg, then Fernando told me he didn't touch Carlito but Carlito made ping, ping, ping, that annoying onomatopoeic sound. And what the hell is this slut doing? She's just standing there by herself, and now what do I say or do (the café was well-lit with people) and if this crazy woman causes a scene?.
Nothing at all, Mía kept looking at me and my husband touched her shoulder and she observed him curiously. Fernando tells her to unbutton two more buttons, Mía obeys. that I had done the same thing. He says something in his ear and she didn't loosen up with her gaze. What the hell is going on here. Three gin tonics were holding back my impulse to get up and yell at him, more than sure if I did it would fall asleep on the floor, snoring.
Mia sighs and tells me -I just want to see how they screw-. Silence.
But if they're not interested, we'll finish our coffee and go our separate ways- he says to Fernando. Total silence. Fernando starts laughing –what are you laughing at, jerk- I say, -what the hell do you want me to laugh about, this woman wants to see us screw like two nothing-burglars, always the same thin one, you're a piece of shit-. Mia calmly replies -I've always wanted to see them screw, but there was no situation to tell them-.
As drunk as I was, I couldn't understand what she wanted to be stupid.
Fernando asks –listen, is there a hotel around here where we can go? -There's an apart- and he interrupts, -no, apart no, hotel, because I'm going to show you how the lady does it-. I'm in a confitería with a girl I knew from work who wants to see me screw?
I wanted to say something and Fernando raised his index finger, crossed his arms. Not much time later, Mia told me about Fernando, that stupid Fernando.
I was olympically drunk, good exactly quite drunk, it didn't matter in that situation, and my husband tells Mia -listen, grab the phone, find out where we're going, -you call the waiter and pay, I order-, she answers -you'll see when the hangover passes, jerk-.
When the waiter approaches I hand him the card, look at Mia's hand, her regular client, almost leaning on my partner's shoulder, I can't say it any other way. The girl didn't move, was concentrated on the cell phone she was handling with one hand -it's ready, find one-. Fernando got up, pulled out my chair and didn't move to do the same with Mia. That's if he put his hand in her ass and took her out of the confitería. He takes it from my arm, I left alone, that's right with the gift, I would only hand it over if I was dead or asleep.
I don't know what to say, I was feeling weak, what was going to happen was going to happen, but I didn't want Fernando to leave. I don't know why I saw him so masculine, never imagined Fernando would do what he did, they'll call it a fool. Let's go to the truck, he opens the door and doesn't do it with Mía who was quiet, he says - unless you want to come down, I'm staying with this young lady -. I didn't get out.THE JOURNEY: MammaMia - Abba/u]
Starts and tells Mía,-take off your pants-, Mía does it and we stop at a red light, my husband turns around and rips off the thong. Mía doesn't say anything, green, we leave, I turn around and tell Mia,-please tell me you're okay, this could end here without drama and nothing will happen?. -Yes, I'm very well, with you guys I'm very safe (and who knows us to know who we are), I always see how your partner is going to come looking for you and they leave holding hands (but what a pain in the butt, that doesn't mean anything, I think).
My husband puts on his underwear on his face (and where did he get it from), looks at me, rolls down the window and throws away the thong, Mía laughs, I turn around and tell her,-it was already very worn out. Almost threw the gift away. These are two sorets like that for anyone and they're even connected from who knows where hell.
Fernando was taken, but very controlled, good, that's what I thought. He asks me again, do you want to get off? I can't respond because he tells Mía,-and you, what do we do?. -I don't want to get off- Mia responds. I hug the box so hard I flatten my hairdo. Fernando says –get a grip, young lady-. I respond –don't even think about mistreating her-. He says –dear, I'm going to take you and not touch her even in passing-.
I had my heart racing, wasn't ashamed or anything that seemed like it, was scared. Mia tells me -are you sure you want to go to the hotel-. Siiiiii she says,-I'm very but very drunk but very but very good-. Two drunks and a monkey with scissors driving.
Fernando tells me –take off her thong and give it- I react “what thong if I'm in my underwear did you tell me to go in my underwear, what's wrong with you, you're crazy”, he laughs the son of a slut. He brakes and says-and get out-, “but you're crazy, what's going on, what are you thinking we are”. Mía touches the man and says quietly,-please pay attention-.
I didn't even think about telling him no, down, Mia opens the door, approaches and puts her hands on my shoulders, the daughter of a slut was enjoying herself and I was coked up, recontracagada. If someone touched my tit, I'd use the word: pussy or they'd be kissing my ass goodnight. Nothing. I lowered the window a bit and saw her hair floating when the air came in, spectacular, needed fresh air, just realized I was really drunk bad. Fernando looked through the rearview mirror.
We stopped again at the traffic light, and I see some guys looking at the truck. The jerk lowers the windows and yells at the dudes, What a night, folks, I'm going to screw two chicks, the dudes honk their horns and Mia laughs. What a lovely jerk is Fernando, Mia says softly.
Mia, are you turned on? I ask, -No, I'm happy screams-. Happy? Go figure out what we ended up doing and this slut tells me I'm happy.
Fernando says, -Mía always the lady puts an excuse, one but here, another but there, I'm 55 and at her age, it'll occur to her when she's 80 to make a trio and the worst is that I'll be dead-. My bombón made me laugh. Mia says, -Today you're okay because we're three-. Fernando starts honking his horn.
I took her to Club Sweet, Fernando tells –we're swingers, it totally interrupts him- No dear, since 40, I propose going first to Anchorena, surely this daughter of a slut will denounce us and close the place-When I debuted at Club Sweet, he interrupts me again and says -I want to know, take me-. We were all laughing so hard. What a crazy cutie, good crazier than me.
I kept thinking, where did this young lady come from that she wants to see us screw?. She's totally crazy in the head. Not much could coordinate, I knew I wasn't going to vomit, not even broken in two, luckily. Always take it at the end of each reunion, a lot, quickly, total mess afterwards.
We had been right, we saw and were seen screwing at Club Sweet. The second time we went, Fernando stopped on the round bed and started eating my cock and the daughter of a slut says, -but strong, suck my cock like you suck it to your husband, the groans cut off for five seconds. Literal.
What a difference from my 30s, kids, buying a house, working to pay everything, working, working, grad school and all the crap you eat to get into university with more crap people. But I was programming myself that year of my 55-year-old piranhas. Fernando always told me reset, sweetie, and then change Windows.The hotel: Pretty Woman - Ray Orbison and Heart of Glass – Blondie.He made Mía pay for the hotel room and breakfast. When we entered the room, he told her at first -Mía put yourself in balls, go to the wall, support your hands, spread your legs-. -Give me your lip liner-, she asked, I have labial lipstick, I respond, Mía says -I have ROUGE (that pronunciation)-. Ehhh, what's going to happen here?. Maybe he'll stick it up his ass. I started laughing and couldn't stop, the two of them turned around and also started laughing, I wanted to tell Mia -they're going to screw you in the ass- but couldn't finish the sentence.
I was out of breath, coughing, laughing, pointing my finger at Mia's ass with mine, still out of breath, coughing, and laughing until I said -I'm about to pee-. I ran to the bathroom, and they're looking at me worriedly, trying to aim for my fat ass (I have big hips) in the toilet, Fernando shouting something on the video, I fell down and couldn't stop laughing but very choked up, my lungs and ribs hurt.
Fernando was hugging me with my inhaler next to me, yelling -crazy, crazy, I'm getting scared-. He was being my boyfriend again, that one who doesn't want anything to happen to me. I looked at him and said -you're not going to put the lip liner in his ass- and we all burst out laughing again. I don't know how long it took until I stopped laughing. I told Mia -he wants to paint your butt, but Fernando wasn't laughing, but Mia was turning red from laughing so much, we looked at each other and started laughing again.
After a while, Fernando asked where the lip liner was, Mia looked at him with a face like -it's in my purse-, he opened it and threw everything on the bed, didn't find the Rouge, I gave it to him and tried to open it, -how do you open this thing-. We started laughing again when we saw him trying to get the rouge out of its packaging, Fernando said -what are these idiots laughing at-, with Mía we couldn't stop and Mía was shouting -I want to see them having sex-. I went back and forth from the bathroom with Mia who followed me and told me -that one, the other-. videt o the toilet.
I say to -Mia we take shampoo?-. Fernando sees me grab the bottle and yells at me, -long hair the bottle you're going to pull out an eye with the cork-, Mia and I start laughing, I throw myself on the floor hugging the bottle, start kicking the floor, Mia lying next to me and suddenly, the bottle corks and we both get soaked. I had ruined Fernando's night.
Fernando takes us to the bathroom floating one of each arm and says, -you sit here and you there-,
Mia says -no I don't want where Clara is- and I yell -I don't want where Mia is-. Fernando is laughing and orders: -stop, silence, these two are such a bunch of idiots that no one can get them out of anywhere-.
It got worse, I started yelling –it's not like Carlito-.Mía stops laughing and asks who Carlito is and I jump on the bed screaming “Carlito is the cock, Carlito is the cock”.
Mia goes to the bathroom and wants Fernando to wrap her up like a mummy with toilet paper, but Fernando keeps pushing her until she sits down and says –enough of this crap-. We put them in the bathtub to see if they can pass the time.
Fernando tries to make the jets work and one shot hits him on the forehead, soaked he turns around to see if we saw what happened, and we start laughing again with our finger pointing at his face.
When I finally fill the tub, Mia is already naked and I take off my clothes as fast as I can. Fernando undresses and leaves her so neat that Mia yells –hurry, hurry-, but he puts on boxers. Mia yells –I want to meet Carlito the little bird-, Fernando gives in, takes off his boxers and Mia says –Mierdaaaaaaaaaaaapero what a son of a slut - I ask her –can you handle your pot like that spoon?-. We start laughing again.
Fernando had the ice bucket in his hand in case we vomited, which didn't happen.
Mia wanted to put the cock in the ice bucket, tried to take it from him, Fernando stood up with his arms raised - He held the cooler, at that moment Mia lowered my boxers, grabbed my cock and said –BUT WHAT A GOOD PIERCING FOR SIGNING THE MEMOS- . I looked at her tits and they were dancing so much because I was laughing. It had been like a whole life since I laughed that much.
Another scandal was when we got kicked out, I left quietly and went to bed. Fernando told me to hydrate as much as possible. The sounds of Mia's tantrums in the bathroom could be heard when Fernando tried to take her away, until silence, she appeared making fun of Fernando, singing and excuse me if I offended “San Lorenzo’s March” and parading around the room.
At one point she stopped talking and told Fernando –I want to unsheathe my corvo cock-, you don't have it responded Fernando -, -oh no look how I pull it out and try to grab her cock-. I wasn't laughing anymore, I was scared it would fall off, break its hip and we'd have to take it out of the hotel in an ambulance, we'd be leaving in a TRIO FALLING ELDERLY WHEN HE WAS MAKING UPA TO A YOUNG WOMAN AND THE background music.
I managed to calm her down and put her next to me, Fernando brought over a bottle of water and Mia said –take a little sip and show me the bird-. Five sips, five times that Fernando took off his boxers, the last time with his index finger starting to give her taps and the bird was moving from side to side. Enough said Fernando –it's not for playing-, Mia stuck out her tongue and said –and what's Carlito for?- We laughed again.
After that, Mia leaned on my shoulder and started snoring, I did too. Fernando didn't sleep because he was scared we'd vomit and choke.
The next morning when we were having breakfast, Mia took the box and said “you deserve it”. I couldn't ask her where they met because Mia asked me: -if you don't mind, can I spend Saturday and Sunday with you-. I looked at her and said –the apartment is small, but come on-. That wasn't a mistake.Definitely Mia had entered our lives.
This short story closes with Sandie Shaw - Puppet On A String.
10 comentários - Señora Mayor y su amiga Mía. (5ta. parte)