Saturday, the mares didn't leave. I mean, if you're thinking like that, Claudio didn't put it in. I'm not going to use accents... don't get mad at me! I'm not going to blame them, that would be unfair. Let's say it was a familiar night. I lit some sausages on the grill, opened a Cabernet and punished some choripanes. Yes, I know I'm not using an accent! After finishing my morphine, I prepared to watch something on TV and the Galician appeared saying We want ice cream! I insisted that it was probably closed for sure. But no, Pepo's slutty ice cream shop doesn't close until late... and take Tuca out for a walk... And there, Claudio and the dog were walking with a paper in hand so they wouldn't forget any taste. I arrived cursing, gave the list to Pepo who was looking at me with disgust because Tuca was sniffing around the corners. Frutis del Bosque is all gone, boss he said and I responded Give me fruit and don't break my balls. On the way back, imagining the protest when I got home, I was telling Tuca (you're not talking to the dog?) that Frutis del Bosque or Frutis de la cock... it had four flavors and I'm going to take a dump... Suddenly, Claudia (the Galician's friend) and her daughter were taken away, dressed in two black dresses... How good they look!! Yes, yes... I'll watch their asses while they get lost at night... Frutis del Bosque... Frutis de la cock... Forbidden fruits... Tuca said: pussy of your mother, the slut who gave birth to you!!!
Today: 5 Fruits of the Cock (forbidden or so)
Who? - 1 - Your daughter's teacher:
How do you suck her?You've been wanting it since the girl was in 3rd grade and you wanted her to turn 18. She smiles at you, gives you the report card, touches your hand when she talks to you. You look at her tits and see how she opens her apron. The fuck happens during recess, who cares how you did it, but you make a girl from the first row cry by hitting her shoulder above the notebook of a guy in the front row. You end up in 5 minutes (which is the length of the short recess) but who's gonna take away what you're enjoying!Sunbathing:7/10 wanting to draw a butty with cum on the apron, crazy!What's up after?The cutie sends you notes in the girl's notebooks and gets risky, ends up sitting on a box of pins that mysteriously appeared in the car seat at just the right moment while you're trying to get your wife out of her eggs and she says... oh... to the teacher today, got pins in ass... coincidence! coincidence!What's the alternative?Make yourself crazy and keep pulling out balls because it will be better than her farting on you with slaps
Who? - 2 - Your wife's best friend:
How do you like it?You know her since your girlfriend's boyfriend. Always gave her a little push when you were careless, she'd ask 'give me another sausage Clau!', if she ate yogurt she'd look at you, if she ate banana she'd look at you... you would eat her half-dressed, one afternoon in July with the closet door open to see her face and (the most important thing) to see yourself getting it on!Sunbathing:8/10 I know you killed the boss thinking about her shrimp more than once!What's up after that?Blame him, tell it to your husband, to your wife, to your old lady. You're left like what you are, a degenerate! When he asked for the chorizo, you should have put it up yourself... and hot as it comes off the grill!What's the alternative?Come on, let her tell your wife, husband, and old lady that you're a faggot. The result is the same crap, but you'll spare yourself from everyone beating you up... especially your old lady who has the heaviest hand like a mole moly with asbestos glove.
Who? - 3 - Your wife's sister:
How do you suck her?Whoever tells me I don't fantasize about the sister-in-law is lying. Even if she's uglier than your wife, you want to fuck her and fantasize about seeing them kiss... if I know you're a degenerate piece of shit! And it happens here. She fights with her boyfriend, she cries, goes to your house just the night the landlord has a dinner party, ends up getting screwed on the living room couch... finishes in her face... look how much crap you are eh?Sunbathing:9/10, you can't stop comparing her pussy to your wife's... The image of that pussy looking at you will follow you for the rest of your lifeWhat's next?It's nothing... Cuties are like that... they hate each other... but you're still staring at her from there on out, like a little puppy just shaved, confirming once again that you're an important idiot. Naty is good, but screw itWhat's the alternative?Stay blind, screw yourself, get a chemical castration, dedicate yourself to bonsai or origami
Who? - 4 - Your daughter's friend
How do you suck her?You know her from girl. One day she got tits out. She runs around your house like a half-naked wild thing. She calls you uncle. If you have a pool, you can see the bells in summer. One day she tells you she likes big guys and ends up stuck against the picnic table with the net on!Sunburnism:10/10 when you're back, grab someone who's already gone wild, all stiff and ready.What's up after?He was a minor fool. You'll end up in jail, just like you will! Take the lip pencil like that guy said, 'Redhead, paint your lips red and leave me an arc of colors in the drawer!' What's the alternative?Hold the cock with the pincer and calm it down by hitting it with the hammer of the skewers on the side of the pins
Who? - 5 - The woman of your dreams
How do you suck her?She is divine, not pretty, do you understand, stupid, the difference? She's not pretty, she's simply divine. She likes Eric Clapton and when you play air guitar, she looks at you with her mouth open for a kiss, has everything you like in the place you like (if you like 3 breasts, she has 3 big ones) The hair that you like on your chest, the skin of the color that drives you crazy, her eyes and slutty gaze or ugly bug look, but it's the cutie you dream about. Don't mess with her, dad... because if you do, she'll stop being a dream!Sunbathing:Infinite... I'm looking at you like an egg and frying it inside your scrotum.What's up after?You breastfeed, cry, list the Platense team that came back from B in 64, tell your friends you want them. You curse all saints and the Virgin... you become Mormon and then an atheistWhat's the alternative?Come to Poringa, make a profile and write stupid texts trying to seem funny and forget her. You don't even forget... Good thing, dude... The day you stop dreaming about her, like Averroes Borges, boom! You disappear into shit!
Claudio hugs you, Good Night!
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Comentarios Destacados
Son todos mitos ( 😳 😁 🤦 ), pero me hiciste reir a muerte, como siempre.
Un abrazo
84 comentários - 5 Fruits of the Cock (Forbidden Laughter)
Dolió imaginar lo de los martillazos del lado de los pinchos...
Me muero de risa con vos Claudio, sos un capo !!! 😀 😀 😀
A favoritos y volveré
Angie
Gracias por compartir.
Angie te deja Besos y Lamiditas !!!
La mejor forma de agradecer la buena onda que se recibe es comentando, al menos al que te comenta. Yo comenté tu post, vos comentaste el mío?
Compartamos, comentemos, apoyemos, hagamos cada vez mejor esta maravillosa Comunidad !!!
Es un verdadero placer encontarrme con tus post, me alegras el dia Claudio!!!
Van puntos y a favoritos!!!
que una pendeja de 20, la miro y me caliento, ya se lo dije y a mi señora tambien, turca... me voy a garchar a tu hermana!!!!!!!!!! y no te rias que hablo sin joda, le voy a pegar una garchada que la voy a dejar preñada de 7 meses!!!+10
Besos y gracias por el aguante!!
NO SÓLO NOS HACES CAGAR DE RISA, NOS SERVÍS LA VERDAD EN UNA BANDEJA PLAGADA DE CARCAJADAS, SINO QUE AL FINAL METÉS UNA FRASE PARA DECIRME EN LA CARA: TOMÁ PUTO MANICERO, SI VOS SOS GRACIOSO, YO SOY INTELIGENTE Y GRACIOSO ADEMÁS DE ALTO CONOCEDOR DE CARNES Y VINOS...
QUE GROSSSSOOOOO!!!!
EXCELENTE COSECHA DE FRUTOS DE LA CHOTA...
eso hace conmigo una de las seños de jardin de mi nena mas chica la puta que me parioooooooooooo
sos el mas grande, ya te lo dije muchas veces y te lo vuelvo a decir porque me la rebanco entendes papaaaaaaaa???
Gracias por el humor y la buena onda 👍
espectacular!!!!!
Abrazo
Mr&Mrs Roses
👍 👍 👍 😄