Capítulo 8 Mi prima, Mara 3

SPOILER
SPOILER
SPOILER
hiphop911ok
If you haven't read My cousin, Mara: The path of temptation don't go any further...
I'm leaving the complete eighth chapter of the third part of the story. It will always be subject to some final revision, so it may have some added later and corrections.
Although the main idea of the chapter is there.

Saludos!!
PD: I won't upload all of them, eh... I only do it because the waiting is getting long jeje
I'm almost done with 40 chapters. It's not much left...
CHAPTER VIII
The look of sadness and disarray that she carried gave me a lot of pain.
It wasn't pity. Of course not. But it got to me.
I think for a moment, I put aside the anger I had because it impacted me seeing her like that.
All that came out was hugging her.
No words were needed.
Of course, she let me do it and squeezed me tightly with her arms.
I perceived an enormous sigh from her part. I felt like she didn't want to let go.
YO: Relax! - I said while embracing her.
I felt the weight of her entire body on mine. The characteristic aroma of her hair, too.
Her breathing seemed something compunged. Like when you cough.
And despite having important breasts, I could feel the accelerated heartbeat of her heart.
MAR: I'd like it if you fell in love with me again.- She expressed with her head resting on my shoulder.
Every word she said made me feel like an ass.
It was obvious that something like this could happen.
Who am I to tell? God...
I didn't know what to say to her.
Probably, if our fight had been for any other reason, we would be rolling around in a bed or couch or anywhere, navigating a sea of reconciliation.
But it wasn't the case.
And while at times I felt like hugging her and holding her, then memories of that fateful night came back to me.
YO: I think I should go, Mar, already... - I said calmly.
She looked at me with those green eyes.
They had an enormous depth like the Atlantic Ocean.
Her lips were shuddered, like when you're trying to hold back something that's about to burst out... I doubled over in two... ME: A face as lovely as yours doesn't deserve to be this way...- I said, pinching her nose with my hand. I always did that. Or pinch her cheekbones. She laughed a little excitedly. Although I'm not sure if what I was saying was doing much good. I just did whatever came out. I don't know if it was from habit or something else. But I wasn't being very direct with her. And then she said something that made me feel a pang in my chest. MAR: Would you give me a kiss?-. She exclaimed, looking at me with a lot of sadness in her eyes and making me feel pain when I breathed. She was flushed, I don't know if it was from the tears that were welling up or from the heat of the moment. I swallowed saliva. ME: It doesn't work like this, Mar.- I said, trying to be nice. MAR: Just one... Don't get an idea of how much... I miss you...-. She said, almost crying. I looked at her. Honestly, I didn't know what to do. Clearly, I didn't feel that awful desire I used to have for her. But something deep inside me was doubting. And I hated myself for it. Neither did I want to give her false expectations. ME: I don't want you...-. She interrupted me. I was going to tell her not to get confused. MAR: Don't say anything... Just that one thing...-. And she came closer to me, looking down. I could feel the tension in the muscles of her face. It was Mara. I'm not sure what made me do it, but I decided to comply with her request. With my right hand, I took hold of her face and pulled her towards me. I did it slowly. Almost immediately, she hugged me. It wasn't a passionate or lustful kiss. She clung to my mouth with a lot of tenderness. I tried not to think about anything. Simply, I closed my eyes. When her mouth met mine, I felt a certain nostalgia. Her breasts pressed against my chest and made me feel how fast her heart was beating. She closed her eyes and kissed me with all she had. No one on earth could say that Mara's kiss isn't lovely. Never. breathing was more agitated than ever. He sent his tongue all the way to my epiglottis. Oomm mm chuik, I heard. We were kissing again. She was sighing like the first time we did it. I opened my eyes for a moment and observed how hers, closed, let out some droplets. What I was doing was wrong. Very wrong. But like many times, I didn't know what else to do. I don't know if it was the moment or what, but I felt a kind of excitement in my lower zone. After all, Mara is a bombshell. And anyone would stop if they were in my place. We stayed like that for half a minute. When again, flashes from that night invaded my head. She against the shower door or on the floor, putting Franco's cock on a bare cable. It was an interminable torture. I stopped kissing her. I couldn't keep doing it. I pulled away from her. ME: I can't, forgive me... She leaned against me, breathing heavily. Her whole mouth taste was still in me. MAR: It's okay, I needed it... too much... I didn't want to be harsh with her. At least not being cruel. But something wasn't letting me go. I couldn't make her feel bad on purpose. I don't understand what was happening to me. Maybe someone else, in my shoes, would be more ruthless, heartless. But it wasn't like that for me, despite everything. I wanted to escape. MAR: I really liked it... Nobody in my whole life kissed me like you...- She said with puppy-dog eyes. She was very beautiful, the truth. I don't know what would happen if I stayed any longer. Or wouldn't want to find out. Although every time I remember that terrible night, everything falls apart. ME: Me too... You know...- I said as much as I could. She smiled. When in that moment, I remembered I hadn't brought the medication. ME: Uh, what a jerk!.- MAR: What happened?-. She asked, surprised. She wasn't hugging me anymore but had one hand on my belt. ME: I was supposed to take it 40 minutes ago... MAR: Uhhh... Take it now! ME: I left it at home...- I answered with a I'm an idiot gesture. Immediately she put... face of 'I don't want you to leave'. We stayed looking at each other for a few seconds. I made a side face and gently touched her hair with my fist. Those gestures came out automatically, without thinking. They were already part of who I was. I think. MAR: Well... See you another day? Want to? Ay Dios... I had to leave before doing something I could regret. YO: Sure, let's talk... As I walked away, I noticed my groin still a bit stiff from the kiss. But I felt a kind of fatigue in my chest. I don't think taking it an hour late once would cause me a problem. Don't? But I felt pressure... I didn't want to grab onto her in front of her, but it hurt a little... She accompanied me to the back door with the electric gate control. Again, I was leaving from her house. Although this time, I was doing so on somewhat better terms. I was getting ready to get into my car. MAR: I really liked that you came... Too bad you didn't stay for dinner YO: Next time!.- I said softly. MAR: Whenever you want...- She said with a smile from ear to ear. I didn't respond, just nodded with my face. I didn't want her to think this would become a habit. It wasn't fair. If it didn't matter to me, I'd stay with Mara. The night was inviting. But beyond that, neither of us was in the right place for it at this moment. Nor was I so heartless as to take advantage of her. I nodded goodbye. She gave me a kiss on the cheek, touching my lip with her finger. Mmmuack she made with her voice. MAR: Later, I'd like to tell you something... I stayed. YO: What is it? MAR: It's a bunch of nonsense, I'll tell you later... You have to take your pill. YO: Sure? MAR: Yes, yes... If you don't sleep, I'll tell you on WhatsApp... YO: Okay.- I smiled as a greeting gesture once more and got into my car. She opened the gate for me and I left, honking at her. I told myself what's the point of all this.... It's true that I loved her crazy, but it wasn't fair to her for these things to happen. I still... I wanted to, but every time I saw her, I felt like a mountain of adverse sensations fell on me.
In other occasions, when I saw her, I'd feel like making love to her anywhere and anytime.
But now it wasn't like that.
And I didn't think it was right to keep talking to her or seeing her.
However, I couldn't cut her off completely. Something wouldn't let me do it. I couldn't do something that would hurt her.
I suppose it must be because of everything we've lived through. I don't know.
And my member seemed to want to contribute to my problem...
I came home with that nasty feeling.
I still had the taste of her saliva in my mouth.
Of course, I didn't dislike it, but every time she was near me, my mind would attack me with images I wanted to forget.
I took a pill and wrote to Mara that I'd arrived.
Me: I've arrived, sorry for leaving like that! Can't be more of an idiot 🤦‍♂️
Mara: 😊
Mara: It doesn't matter, it was good seeing you for a bit and talking about some things...
Me: I'm glad...
Me: In the end we didn't even watch the movie jaja
Mara: No, poor Arsenio jajaja
Me: 🤣
Mara: Jeje
Mara: What I was going to tell you... Hope you won't get mad 😔
¡Right! I wanted to tell something.
I wondered what it could be for so much mystery.
Me: Yes, tell me!
I didn't have much appetite, so I went to bed like that.
I was on my way to the room with the phone in hand.
Mara: I didn't know what else to do, I hope I'm not bothering you
Me: Haha
Mara: Franco wrote me a couple of times... He knew we...
Mara: That...
Mara: And I got tired of telling him I didn't want to talk to him or anything, but since he insisted, I told him we were together... How?
I knew that creep was getting close, but I had completely forgotten about him.
I froze when I read that.
Me: Does it bother you?
Mara: No, not anymore... Since I told him that, he hasn't spoken to me again. What a solution! jeje
Mara: Is it bothering you?
Me: No, everything's fine...
It was logical that this would happen.
Consequences...
Now, I don't know how long that lie will last, I thought.
He'd realize it at some point.
Mara: Goodbye ☺
Me: De nothing! And eat something, you're so skinny haha
MAR: Haha I was going to sleep like that
YO: Me too! But don't go without eating...
MAR: With the kiss you gave me, it's enough for today
Ugh...
I stayed looking at my phone with a I knew it face.
False hopes... I would never have wanted that to believe.
I admit that I liked her kiss. But if I said I was thinking about a possible reconciliation in the future, I'd be a serial liar.
I stayed quiet. Thinking about what to respond.
But she got me back.
MAR: Sorry, don't mind me. Re cuack haha
YO: Haha
YO: If that jerk bothers you, let me know!
I almost said that.
To at least make her not feel like it's a rejection.
MAR: I don't think so but okay, go ahead!
MAR: Thanks ❤
YO: You're welcome!
YO: Talk to you, kisses!
MAR: Kisses, I love you!
MAR: 😘😘
That annoying pinch again... What was happening?
I was recovering well... I'm the same I replied and stopped writing.
I hope there won't be any more problems for me. That my situation with treatment doesn't get complicated.
But that day, several times, I had that feeling of pain... It's a mess...
I spent some time playing with my phone, mostly watching videos.
I didn't know what to think about that night, honestly. My life was a chaos and I didn't know where to go.
I think I fell asleep at some point.
At midnight, I woke up, everything still on.
I no longer felt that fatigue in my chest.
I went to the bathroom, took water and ate something.
The low point comes back sometimes, je.
I was leaning against the counter eating a cold chicken sandwich when I saw that on Facebook, I had a friend request.
I admit that the first thing I thought was Is it Sabrina?.
Although it seemed impossible. Why would she do it?
But it wasn't her.
It was Sofia Machado, an ex-high school classmate.
I was quite surprised.
Especially because the friend request, she had sent around midnight.
I remember she was a very but very pretty girl.
At that moment, everyone's eyes were on Mara, but she was beautiful too. Almost transparent blonde, blue eyes. But blue, post. It had been a thousand years since I hadn't spoken to her. In fact, I doubted if the last time had been at our graduation party, je. I accepted and entered her profile to see what wave her life was. Almost as if she had disappeared after graduation. She didn't have too much activity. Apparently, she wasn't very fond of social networks. But there were many photos. One in particular caught my attention. It was in a bikini on the beach. It was a green one, tiny. I didn't remember her being so tall... The red hair, half-curly, was as long as Mara's. Maybe a bit less, but well extended. And her body was similar. Almost like Lorena, maybe. Beautiful, really... No doubt that time had passed better for her. Also, I realized she had few ex-classmates on face. Three counting me. I felt someone coming. It was my brother Mike. MIK: You were the rat who listened... YO: Look at it, guy... More respect, I'm the older one. I'll give you a steak! MIK: Don't hit anyone, salami... Me made me laugh. What a jerk... YO: Did he paint hunger? MIK: Bad jaja Did anything remain or did you eat everything? YO: Yes, there is... I was going to open the fridge. YO: Where are you going? MIK: Run, plague... YO: Ask permission, slut jaja We started to struggle clearly in a joke. YO: No, you know that's not...- He wasn't letting me pass. MIK: Use the word: pussy of your sister...- He laughed. The son of a slut, seeing he couldn't pass, took out the piece of milanesa I had in my hand. YO: Eh, what are you doing? jaja MIK: You got caught with the milanesa, by gil!.- And he went walking to his room, making faces like Maywheater. It was too funny not to get angry. I washed my hands and headed to the room. When I felt real terror. Looking at the cell phone, I noticed that without wanting it, I had liked Sofia's photo. I couldn't be more idiotic. It must have been during the struggle, sure. What now? Was I just going to like her? It remained like the ass.
He was gone, I took him out, I thought to myself.
And I did it.
Before going on making a mess, I went to sleep.

Days...
A few passed by, during which I focused on recovering.
I trained quite a bit, went to the doctor's office and worked from home.
But what was most relevant, perhaps, was that the lady who rented the chalet I liked called me.
I don't know if it was just coincidence or that she ended up being my grandmother's acquaintance.
It's a small world I thought at that moment.
They knew each other from the retirees' club...
Well, she talked to me a bit about the house and told me that the next three months she would be spending with her grandchildren at her coastal home.
But since the house was empty, she offered something impossible to refuse.
Of course, it helped that I was my grandmother's grandson...
Otherwise, it wouldn't have been possible. But she proposed entering without a deposit, just paying for the months I lived there and if I liked it, we would make a contract when she returned.
I thought it was a great idea.
Excellent, I'd say.
What I had seen in the photos, I loved.
We talked for a good while and agreed to meet that afternoon.
The rental was quite accessible and I didn't need to furnish it. At least not too much.
I think it was a good time to move out alone.
I remember being very anxious until it was time.
I told my old lady and she was amazed at the possibility of me leaving.
Or rather, she got happy but stayed put.
Although I practically spent most of my time with Mara, I never moved completely.
Before leaving, I saw that on the phone, I had a message from her.
Hello 😊
A few days had passed and I hadn't written back to her.
Yes, I had thought about what happened at her house.
How not to?
But I didn't talk to her...
I: Hello!
I: How are you??
Meanwhile, I was changing to go out.
I wanted to make a good impression on Mrs.
M: Fine, and you?
I: Just leaving haha
M: Ah, okay! No problem 😊
I: Not nothing happens haha
I: I'm going to see an apartment to rent 😀
MAR: Posta?
I: Yes yes, actually a little cottage.
I: It's time for me to have my own space.
It took me a while to respond.
We had searched for apartments together many times.
It was one of our goals at some point.
Now we were separated and I was looking for one for myself.
Once, we almost did it, but the guys convinced us to live there since they weren't home most of the time and considered it funny that we would pay rent.
MAR: That's great! I'm very happy!
My subconscious betrayed me again.
One more time.
I: Do you want to come with me to see it?
Why did I say that?
Why was I doing those stupid things? It seemed silly...
It was already too late to regret it.
MAR: Would you like me to come with you?
Now I had to downplay its importance.
I: Yes, if you're sober we can go...
MAR: I'm re chiruza jajjaj
I: Just you? I don't believe it...
MAR: 😊
MAR: In 5 minutes
The world was conspiring for everything I said to be lovely. For it to seem like I always had her in mind.
I promised myself not to create any situation this time.
We both needed to get used to this new stage. It wasn't bad.
I waited a few minutes to give her time to change.
I put on my black leather jacket and went out there.
I was so excited about the house that I didn't think about anything else.
We lived very close, so I told her I was leaving for her place and would be there in no time.
When I arrived, she was already at the door, waiting from the inside.
Luckily she was sober...
She had a worn-out blue jean pinched at the waist without a belt. A tight white t-shirt that made her big breasts visible and a little leather jacket just like mine.
She looked very nice. Simple but nice.
Her hair was as smooth as if it had been ironed for days.
I kept looking at her until she went up, of course.
I got stuck when I greeted her.
Always so flirtatious...
Hello she said with a big smile.
I admit that I blinded. Yes. But then I snapped back to reality. 'Hello, you look lovely' I said, more out of courtesy than anything else. MAR: Thanks... You too... I had already gotten nervous. It was hard to keep my wits and posture with a girl like her. Honestly. Her figure made my legs tremble so much. So beautiful. And it reminded me of one of the first times we went out together, when I went to pick her up from a friend's place in Capital... We took off. I wasn't saying a word. MAR: Did you do something to the interior?.- She asked surprised by how shiny and renovated the car looked. YO: Haha, no! Mike was using it... MAR: It seems good... Well Michael haha YO: In some way he has to pay for using the boat haha If he always screws up the car. Of course it didn't compare to a new one or from another brand. But the Fiat is history, culture... And she had always seen it like that. Especially because of our grandfather. Caringly she would call it 'the machine' in honor of him, who had a white 1993 Fiat Duna SCL, which was full of anecdotes in our family. How I missed the old guy... And especially in an era like this, so sad for me. Anyway, talking about him, we arrived at Mrs. Elba's house. MAR: Is that it? She asked surprised. Until then she hadn't said anything about the plans we had previously. YO: Yes, it looks bigger than in the photo... It had a rolling grille on one side to let a car in. The front was huge. Maybe it wasn't as deep inside, I mean. Since otherwise it wouldn't match the photos. At first glance, it impressed me well.MARCH: The front is huge haha
I: Bad...
We put the car on the verge and got out.
It didn't seem to have too much depth, that's true.
But I wasn't interested in it either.
I: It looks like a big shed, doesn't it?
MARCH: Haha yes...
She was looking. It seemed she had liked it too.
I: We'll see how it is inside but it has a bathroom, kitchen, living room and a bedroom
MARCH: It seems nice
The lady came out to receive us.
I think seeing me with a girl inspired her even more confidence.
She smiled and made us enter with an affectionate greeting.
Mara was looking at everything, seemed like she was the one moving in.
It was as I thought.
The house had a wide front but not so deep, but it could still live two people very comfortably.
The back wasn't so small and was covered in green grass.
A nice grill decorated one of the walls.
It had everything and made use of every meter of space it had.
The bedroom was big. There was a double bed, at least a 40-inch LCD
The living room wasn't very spacious, but there was enough room for armchairs that could accommodate up to six or seven people comfortably.
The bathroom, very modern. Shower with bathtub and glass partitions. Slightly larger than Mara's general bathroom.
She then gave me her approval with a glance. Especially considering the price I had been quoted by the owner.
ELB: I'm going away this weekend with the guys... If you want, you can bring your things. It's renting it as is...
I looked at Mara who was smiling to one side.
I: I don't have many options with such a great proposal.- I said with very good vibes.
ELB: Well... Here are the keys...
I swear I couldn't believe it.
I already had a place to live!
When I grabbed the keys, I felt a sense of well-being that I couldn't explain.
I enjoyed every microsecond while loading the keyring.
I looked at Mara and she gave me a smile.
It made her happy on one side, but I sensed something was thinking on the other.
I: Well, I have to pay now haha
ELB: Me transfer to this account from one to four and we are... Don't worry. Very nice woman. OK, thank you very much for everything... No, to you boys, enjoy it... I thought she would have thought it was my girlfriend and we were going to live together there. I preferred not to comment on that. Not this time, je. We talked for a few more minutes and then got into the car to leave. Mara had a slightly sad look. I hadn't thought about how that comment could upset her. Because since she heard it, she's been like that. It occurred to me to thank her for accompanying me. And I said to her, looking at her eyes, Let's get an ice cream... She looked back at me timidly. Mara said, I came with you on the wave, you don't have to go out with me to pay you back... - She replied in a good way, but with something of resentment in her voice. I said, Okay, no problem... To not give it more importance. Mara: I didn't say I didn't want... Just that you don't owe me anything. I was surprised by her reaction, although it wasn't bad. Maybe she thought I felt obligated to do something for her, given the current circumstances. I said, I'm not selling you anything... For your good mood today, I just asked if you wanted to go get something, like friends, nothing more... Mara: Okay... Sure thing! - And she smiled sideways. Maybe she felt uncomfortable for a moment. Like I should invite her out of obligation. But it was just a gesture with someone I've known for a long time. The misunderstanding cleared up, we looked for where to park. There was plenty of space at a well-known ice cream shop. We parked outside and got ready to get out. I don't remember when the last time was that we had gone out together. I waited for her to get out and we walked side by side to one of the tables. Every now and then my gaze would drift towards her. She was very beautiful. Posta. Although I tried not to make it so. I put my phone on the table and grabbed the menu. I already knew what she was going to order, I just waited for her to tell me. no we were coming...- I said looking at the place.
MAR: Yes, I think since before Covid.
YO: It's true... Well, you had a fruit sorbet with cream and granizado, with a cherry...
She made a side face.
I was going to order my usual, but there were a couple of new tastes and I was thinking.
After a few seconds, I looked at Mara to ask her about one I didn't know.
She had a terrible face...
What happened? I wondered.
It had been just moments ago that she was fine. Not 100% happy, but nothing like now.
YO: Did something happen?- I asked.
She didn't answer.
The girl came and I told her the ice cream flavors we wanted.
YO: Hey!- I said softly.
MAR: Nothing... You got a Facebook message.- She expressed looking to the side.
I found it strange.
What could be like that?
As I was surprised, I grabbed my phone and looked.
It was a message from Sofia.
Hi Johnny, long time no see!! How are you?? It doesn't seem like time has passed for you jeje.
I stood still.
The truth is, it was a surprise that she would write to me.
She didn't say anything out of this world. Or did she?
I looked at Mara and said:
YO: Do you remember Sofia Machado from school?
MAR: Yes, I know who she is...- She said with annoyance. The face she had.
YO: It's her, she had disappeared haha. She added me the other day.
MAR: Yeah, see...
She was still annoyed.
YO: What's wrong, Mar?
MAR: Nothing... You're right, it doesn't concern me what you do. Sometimes I forget we're not together anymore.
The thing was starting to get uncomfortable again.
YO: All good...
MAR: It's nice... It's fine.
YO: She just added me on Facebook, that's all...
Something was bothering her.
It was too strange for her to be upset because an ex-classmate talked to me.
MAR: You're required lately jaja
How strange it felt. I didn't expect it from her, a jealousy scene.
Anyone would say it would be me the jealous one, with a girl as vibrant as Mara.
Since we had sat down, several of those who had passed by had looked at her.
YO: Nothing to see... Besides, you... Do you remember how Sofia was... More anti-jaja. I was going to say something but she clammed up. I noticed it on her face. ME: What? MAR: Nothing... - Expressed looking aside. Something was hiding. ME: Tell me... what's going on? MAR: I don't have to get involved in your life. It's nothing, already. ME: You're not getting involved, you're asking me... What's going on? MAR: She always liked you more... Didn't you know? I opened my eyes like a cunt. How? Sofia? ME: You're crazy, you... jaja MAR: Post! Why would I lie to you?. - It seemed to say with great credibility in her face. ME: Jaja And how do you know that? Let's see... They brought the ice cream. We thanked the girl and waited for her response. It couldn't be true. She must have been upset or jealous. It was very rare. MAR: Because she told us years ago... I stayed hard. ME: How? MAR: Yes... She told us you liked her, in high school ME: Never told me... Nor did you tell me either. MAR: You already had a girlfriend or something, I don't know what it was... You weren't going to tell me and asked me and the girls not to tell you. Shit. What a revelation... ME: Neither did you tell me later... Over the years... MAR: Honestly, I didn't have it in mind. It was ages ago, I think. What a surprise! I was with a girl at the time. But if I had known Sofia liked... It would be the same. I'm still surprised she was jealous of someone I hadn't seen in years and not with who I was with and that was part of all the mess. Well, it could also be. But anyone else shouldn't mean anything next to what happened with Sabrina. I noticed Mara was uncomfortable. She made faces like she wanted to tell me a thousand things but didn't. It wasn't a very pleasant exit. We finished the ice cream changing the subject and I don't know, but it was evident the discomfort. On the way back, almost didn't open her mouth. I talked to her a few times, but noticed she was upset and preferred not to insist anymore. She thanked me for the ice cream, that's all. But it was the only thing she did on the whole trip. Definitely not going to be possible a relationship like that with her. Clearly things weren't going to work out that way.

I greeted her well, but her irises said otherwise. I knew her.

Thanks for the ice cream and congratulations on the apt she said as she left.

I was left with a bitter taste.

I couldn't go out with her again, it was obvious.

That's when I knew I wouldn't do it again...

It wasn't good for either of us. And that, deep down, left me very sad.

I waited for her to come in.

I felt a certain pity seeing her image disappear from my view.

That ice cream, that incredible person had once been the most important woman in my life.

What a tragic ending it all had. No doubt about it.

I went out badly. Very annoyed.

When I got home, I spent a good while brooding.

Only when my old lady arrived could I distract myself for a bit.

No desire to answer Sofia's call, I gave in.

When I heard my old lady had entered, I went down to tell her the news.

She took it pretty well.

Especially considering two of my other brothers would still be living there, with no intention of leaving anytime soon.

She made me some mates and we chatted for a bit.

More about what had happened to me than anything else.

The only thing that worried her was that something might happen to me while I was alone.

I didn't think it could happen again. It was impossible...

My studies were going well and I felt better every day.

She also asked about Mara, but I preferred not to talk about that.

Then my brothers arrived and I invited them over for some pizzas to celebrate, je.

Well, I forgot about what had happened for a bit.

Later, yes, I did answer Sofia's call.

How are you, Sofi?

Yes, something passed!

Not even time passed for you, jeje.

The last sentence wasn't meant to be a come-on.

I just wrote it.

I started watching TV and it got late. Sleep was starting to take over my body.

Although near midnight, when I was about to fall asleep, Mara wrote to me again.

It didn't bother me that she did, but I hated not being able to do anything Nothing so that everything would be like before.

I could already feel the bitterness when opening the message. I miss you 😔 it said.

I didn't like that.

Firstly, for her and secondly, for me.

Something inside of me was breaking.

The question was that I couldn't talk to her normally, say nice things, make her laugh as always.

And if that didn't happen. She wouldn't feel better either.

😊

What are you doing?

I wrote it like this to her.

Nada, I was thinking about you... I miss you so much...

Forgive me if it bothers you, but I can't take this situation anymore.

I was sadder than I thought.

I didn't stop cursing the hour when we decided to run away from our path.

Yo: I also thought about you today...

Sí?

Yo: Yes... I always think of everything.

Yo: Not me... The only thing that kills me is being without you 😔

It hurt me a lot.

Yo: We've already talked about this, Mar... It's hard for me too

MAR: I see you're living your life, more or less normally...

MAR: From when I get up until I go to bed, I don't stop missing you...

MAR: To your kisses, your hugs, your messages...

What misery.

I couldn't keep going like this.

What should I answer?

What could I put without lying to her? Without deceiving her?

Yo: Do you think it's easy for me to see you and not want to do the same?

Yo: Do you think it's easy for me? That I didn't get the urge to hug and kiss you when you were at your house the other day?

MAR: Did you feel like kissing me?

Yo: Yes, deep down, and despite everything that happened, for a moment I was about to do it before you asked me...

Yo: But I can't get those images of yours out of my head, in the shower, on the floor, against the wall... I can't.

Yo: And every time I do, I want to get away from you.

MAR: Get everything out that's inside you...

Yo: It doesn't work like that, Mar...

Yo: Today, when I went to look for you, I remembered that time when I went to find you at CABA because of your friend.

Yo: You were almost dressed the same way

MAR: When we went to the fair?

Yo: Yes... And do you think it doesn't affect me at all?

MAR: Oh, if only I could... erase all those bad things from your mind
I: But it can't... and I can't be myself, with you, when I remember them.
I: I'm really sorry, but I can't
M: Then what?
I: We shouldn't talk or see each other anymore… I don't like seeing you sad
When I finished writing that, I felt a fatigue in my chest again.
It had been recurring lately.
M: Don't tell me that
I: It's just that I don't see any other solution... No matter how much has passed, it tears me apart to see you with that miserable sadness and I feel like I'm contributing to destroying you further
M:
I: I wish it were different, I really mean it
M: You're right...
M: And forgive me for everything
M: I love you
A sense of anger overwhelmed me.
I grabbed the cell phone and threw it against the wall. It broke into several pieces.
I felt a terrible urge to scream with all my might until I fainted. I fell to my knees on the floor…
Why did I do what I did?
I was happy with what I had…
I wish nothing from that whole thing had ever happened. How it ruined my life...