Whoever didn't know the mythical Pornstar of early 2000 in her Lolita scenes, since today she has already retired from that world to take care of her son, to whom she wrote the following letter
The Daily Beast portal published a letter that famous adult film actress Aurora Snow (her real name is Rebecca Kensington) wrote to her son who will be born next December. This is a translation of the original text.
I was lying on the doctor's consulting room, with cold gel on my small belly, listening to a second heartbeat emanating from within me. The ultrasound made it a reality. When they told me it was a boy, my whole life passed before my eyes. I felt responsible for the decisions I had made. Someday I'll have to give explanations to my son.
This is what I would say:
My son,
As I write this, you're not yet in the world, you won't be born until mid-December. By the time you read this, you'll be old enough to navigate the internet, old enough to like girls, and old enough to know the name Aurora Snow. I've feared this day for many years and my hope is that you find this text before accidentally stumbling upon some photos or videos showing your mom in a way she never intended. Let me explain.
Your mom was poor, very poor during her childhood. In early 2000, I was attending the University of California in Irvine, and despite being an exemplary student, having top grades, and spending weeks filling out applications, my student loans were suffocating me. Frustrated and feeling like my chance to attend higher education was slipping away, I responded to a newspaper ad in the Orange County Register.
I had no shame and needed the money. I was sure I would never want my own family. It happened before everything went online and I really thought I could hide it from my mom, dad, and brothers. What did I have to lose? I planned to do it for a year, pay off my student loans, and retire without looking back. Things didn't...
functioned like that.
The attention made me feel good. The money was incredible. But even with the attention, I never felt beautiful. I thought they would realize their mistake at any moment and ask me to leave and bring back the beautiful girl from home. They never did. And that nude modeling job soon led someone to ask me to have sex on camera for money. Even more money. I said yes, and that option took me down the agitated and colorful path of adult cinema.
For reasons I still don't know, they continued asking me to make movies. Soon I was on movie covers, posters, and even commercial TV programs. Your great-grandmother was the first to discover your mom's secret (she saw me on a VHS tape at her friend's house), and soon she told your grandma and uncles. Despite being disappointed with my decisions, they never stopped loving me and supporting me.
Your grandma thought I should do something with my mind and not with my body. She worried a lot about me and always hoped I would find the way out. Although we never had a direct conversation, it was always evident. Your grandpa lived in another state and found out what I did when he saw me on Howard Stern's TV show. In retrospect, I was very grateful to be one of the few girls on Howard Stern's show who kept their clothes on. I maintained a sense of modesty when I wasn't on set.
At this point in your life, I hope I've taught you the importance of honesty, and that's why I'll be honest with you. I've almost done everything imaginable in my adult film career, and if you dig deep enough, you'll find things that will seem very horrible to you. I can honestly say that I approached the adult film industry like a job, and just like any job I've had, I felt it was important to do my best. Sometimes...
My job meant doing disgusting things. I hope you never see that. Something that really changed my life happened on February 20, 2009. Your Uncle Keith had a terrible motorcycle accident, broke his neck, and two of his younger sons came to live with me. I didn't know what to do with kids, but I was forced to learn while taking care of your cousins for two years until Uncle Keith recovered. During this time something changed. I felt something very powerful happening inside me when one of my nephews put his arms around me, trusting his life in me and giving me unconditional love. Suddenly I realized: Damn, I want to have my own family. I never believed in love and terrified anyone or anything that could commit me. I was a free spirit who could pack up and leave without notice at any moment, but those feelings dissipated when I realized what I was missing. My priorities changed. I was no longer the girl willing to do anything, instead I became a woman with a goal. I wanted a family, but first I had to find someone to create that family with. It wasn't an easy task. A great friend introduced me to a good guy from the Midwest, who also worked in the entertainment industry creating TV shows. He was warm, charming, and very family-oriented. Despite wanting to leave, it's hard to change after having committed 10 years of your life to a career, regardless of what career it is. Your dad recognized the cycle I was in and said: Press the Eject button. It was advice I was finally ready to hear. For the first time, I had the motivation and courage to leave the business. Son, I hope this text helps you understand and warns you not to click on the links to my XXX videos. The decisions we make can change our lives forever Our way in a manner that perhaps at the moment we don't understand. I took decisions that led me down a path that many people judge. Despite what I thought then, these are the decisions I now explain to my own son. Everything boils down to those decisions. If I had known that someday I would change my way of thinking and want my own family, I would have taken different decisions. I can't say they would have been better decisions, because every decision I've made has brought me to this point and wouldn't make it different. When you're 18 years old, it's so easy to see the future and know exactly what you want and don't want, but only 10 years later comes hindsight.
Then, remember, when you're taking important decisions for your life, think about the future and ask yourself: “Can I live with it?”. My answer is in this letter, which I hope will speak for itself.
With love,
Mom.
The Daily Beast portal published a letter that famous adult film actress Aurora Snow (her real name is Rebecca Kensington) wrote to her son who will be born next December. This is a translation of the original text.I was lying on the doctor's consulting room, with cold gel on my small belly, listening to a second heartbeat emanating from within me. The ultrasound made it a reality. When they told me it was a boy, my whole life passed before my eyes. I felt responsible for the decisions I had made. Someday I'll have to give explanations to my son.
This is what I would say:
My son,
As I write this, you're not yet in the world, you won't be born until mid-December. By the time you read this, you'll be old enough to navigate the internet, old enough to like girls, and old enough to know the name Aurora Snow. I've feared this day for many years and my hope is that you find this text before accidentally stumbling upon some photos or videos showing your mom in a way she never intended. Let me explain.
Your mom was poor, very poor during her childhood. In early 2000, I was attending the University of California in Irvine, and despite being an exemplary student, having top grades, and spending weeks filling out applications, my student loans were suffocating me. Frustrated and feeling like my chance to attend higher education was slipping away, I responded to a newspaper ad in the Orange County Register.
I had no shame and needed the money. I was sure I would never want my own family. It happened before everything went online and I really thought I could hide it from my mom, dad, and brothers. What did I have to lose? I planned to do it for a year, pay off my student loans, and retire without looking back. Things didn't...
functioned like that.
The attention made me feel good. The money was incredible. But even with the attention, I never felt beautiful. I thought they would realize their mistake at any moment and ask me to leave and bring back the beautiful girl from home. They never did. And that nude modeling job soon led someone to ask me to have sex on camera for money. Even more money. I said yes, and that option took me down the agitated and colorful path of adult cinema.
For reasons I still don't know, they continued asking me to make movies. Soon I was on movie covers, posters, and even commercial TV programs. Your great-grandmother was the first to discover your mom's secret (she saw me on a VHS tape at her friend's house), and soon she told your grandma and uncles. Despite being disappointed with my decisions, they never stopped loving me and supporting me.
Your grandma thought I should do something with my mind and not with my body. She worried a lot about me and always hoped I would find the way out. Although we never had a direct conversation, it was always evident. Your grandpa lived in another state and found out what I did when he saw me on Howard Stern's TV show. In retrospect, I was very grateful to be one of the few girls on Howard Stern's show who kept their clothes on. I maintained a sense of modesty when I wasn't on set.
At this point in your life, I hope I've taught you the importance of honesty, and that's why I'll be honest with you. I've almost done everything imaginable in my adult film career, and if you dig deep enough, you'll find things that will seem very horrible to you. I can honestly say that I approached the adult film industry like a job, and just like any job I've had, I felt it was important to do my best. Sometimes...
My job meant doing disgusting things. I hope you never see that. Something that really changed my life happened on February 20, 2009. Your Uncle Keith had a terrible motorcycle accident, broke his neck, and two of his younger sons came to live with me. I didn't know what to do with kids, but I was forced to learn while taking care of your cousins for two years until Uncle Keith recovered. During this time something changed. I felt something very powerful happening inside me when one of my nephews put his arms around me, trusting his life in me and giving me unconditional love. Suddenly I realized: Damn, I want to have my own family. I never believed in love and terrified anyone or anything that could commit me. I was a free spirit who could pack up and leave without notice at any moment, but those feelings dissipated when I realized what I was missing. My priorities changed. I was no longer the girl willing to do anything, instead I became a woman with a goal. I wanted a family, but first I had to find someone to create that family with. It wasn't an easy task. A great friend introduced me to a good guy from the Midwest, who also worked in the entertainment industry creating TV shows. He was warm, charming, and very family-oriented. Despite wanting to leave, it's hard to change after having committed 10 years of your life to a career, regardless of what career it is. Your dad recognized the cycle I was in and said: Press the Eject button. It was advice I was finally ready to hear. For the first time, I had the motivation and courage to leave the business. Son, I hope this text helps you understand and warns you not to click on the links to my XXX videos. The decisions we make can change our lives forever Our way in a manner that perhaps at the moment we don't understand. I took decisions that led me down a path that many people judge. Despite what I thought then, these are the decisions I now explain to my own son. Everything boils down to those decisions. If I had known that someday I would change my way of thinking and want my own family, I would have taken different decisions. I can't say they would have been better decisions, because every decision I've made has brought me to this point and wouldn't make it different. When you're 18 years old, it's so easy to see the future and know exactly what you want and don't want, but only 10 years later comes hindsight.
Then, remember, when you're taking important decisions for your life, think about the future and ask yourself: “Can I live with it?”. My answer is in this letter, which I hope will speak for itself.
With love,
Mom.
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