For all the rough, antisocial, and tough guys that we want to seem like, even Lucas, the macho weightlifter from the Gym, we'd like to be in a relationship with a woman who supports us absolutely for all our things.
When I refer to all our things, it includes:
1. Farting in bed
2. Semen in the mouth
3. Booty delivery
4. Infidelity
5. Burping
6. Playing soccer every Sunday
7. After office every Wednesday
8. Winning eleven with friends
9. Fantasizing about her sister
10. Morning blow job
11. Watching porn together
12. Cooking every night
13. Getting Premium accounts on Rapidshare
14. Following the Pity of Intoxicated wherever they go
15. Playing Truco
To be able to handle those things we normally do (or that come across our minds), we have to be a kind of charming man. And for that, we need to practice, row, lie, etc.
The first thing we should know is if we are ready at this moment to have a partner, so we will evaluate through a multiple-choice test based on mathematical and strategic algorithms our current state and position in the market.
Let's start:
A woman from work drives you crazy. In one of the chats, you hear she likes romantics. Then you proceed to:
1. Send her a letter to her home address.
2. Send her an email with a declaration of love to her hotmail mailbox.
3. Send her a Gusanito.com postcard.
4. Send her a Gusanito.com postcard with a virus that collects all the information about her movements on the computer, analyzes who she writes to and the photos she sends via Msn, then hack into her PC, destroy everything, and later collaborate in its repair so she sees you as a good man.
5. Send her SPAM for Viagra.
He's driving down the 25 de Mayo highway when suddenly he passes through a toll booth. The toll attendant drives him crazy. Below his window is written: Florencia Fernandez.
1. He greets her kindly and thanks her for her treatment.
2. He leaves his personal card so she can get in touch with him.
3. He remembers her name and adds her on Facebook when he gets home.
4. He adds her on Facebook using Rolando Graña's profile picture.
5. When she doesn't react, he yells at her: You're going to die working at a toll booth, useless!!
You know a girl, invite her to your house for dinner with your parents. At the table are your mom, dad, you, and the lady you want to conquer. After a PERFECT hour of dinner, your father accidentally lets out a pretty noticeable fart, with a sound approximately like this: PRRRRRRR!!
1. You act as if nothing happened.
2. You look at your father with a piercing gaze.
3. He gets up embarrassed and takes your girl to another room.
4. He asks if anyone heard thunder.
5. You ask your girl: Do you want my old man to take you on his motorcycle home? Because I think he's already started it
You invite her to eat at Los Maizales, a restaurant with good food and careful service:
1. You accompany her in choosing the appetizer, then the plate, and finally the dessert, all very delicately ending in ito.
2. Eat normally but carefully, without losing your manners.
3. Take out a Coto supermarket bag from the astronaut jacket pocket and start packing away leftover food, saying: It's for the dog, see?
You know a nice girl through email and decide to add her on MSN and ask for a photo, especially:
1. A normal photo
2. A nude photo
3. Webcam strip tease
4. A photo of her masturbating with a double-ended plug and 3 background painters
You invite her to an electronic party:
1. You start dancing with her.
2. You tell her you're friends with the DJ to gain importance.
3. Invite her to take a Don Perignon in the VIP area.
4. Try to slip some Pepa's plans to her that mixed with a little vodka, possibly she could get drunk with her friends. You invite her to spend Holy Week at a prestigious Bungalow in Mar de las Pampas. On the way, the lady in question needs to go to the bathroom because she's feeling unwell. 1. You speed up to the gas station and wait for her to finish her business. When she returns to the car, you only ask: “Is everything okay?” 2. You stop at a hidden spot on the road and hand her Carilina wipes so she can clean herself. 3. You tell her to take a dump in the bushes, give her a Claringrilla to wipe her ass, film it all with your Motorola Rockr and then upload it to Youtube. They block it for obscene content, so you upload it to Pornhub.com and Poringa.net. She goes to bed with her ideal woman to enjoy the FIRST night of sex. You have to surprise her: 1. You undress her very slowly, start kissing all over her body and turn off the light on the bedside table. 2. Try to surprise her with a bouquet of roses inside the bed for her surprise when she enters. 3. Turn around and force her to watch you masturbating with Sandro's double photo. In summary, the above points are relative and depend on age to know how to approach a woman. From 6 to 17 years old, don't approach her, no matter how headmaster it seems in the photolog, you'll end up with your hands full. From 18 to 26, possibly your freshness and craziness will make her fall in love. From 27 to 35, they're looking for entrepreneurs, people with money and who are at least presentable to their family. From 36 to 45, they're looking for someone who can take them to the movies. From 45 and up, they're looking for someone who will accept their children and bankroll them. A big hug to all, dear brothers!
When I refer to all our things, it includes:
1. Farting in bed
2. Semen in the mouth
3. Booty delivery
4. Infidelity
5. Burping
6. Playing soccer every Sunday
7. After office every Wednesday
8. Winning eleven with friends
9. Fantasizing about her sister
10. Morning blow job
11. Watching porn together
12. Cooking every night
13. Getting Premium accounts on Rapidshare
14. Following the Pity of Intoxicated wherever they go
15. Playing Truco
To be able to handle those things we normally do (or that come across our minds), we have to be a kind of charming man. And for that, we need to practice, row, lie, etc.
The first thing we should know is if we are ready at this moment to have a partner, so we will evaluate through a multiple-choice test based on mathematical and strategic algorithms our current state and position in the market.
Let's start:
A woman from work drives you crazy. In one of the chats, you hear she likes romantics. Then you proceed to:
1. Send her a letter to her home address.
2. Send her an email with a declaration of love to her hotmail mailbox.
3. Send her a Gusanito.com postcard.
4. Send her a Gusanito.com postcard with a virus that collects all the information about her movements on the computer, analyzes who she writes to and the photos she sends via Msn, then hack into her PC, destroy everything, and later collaborate in its repair so she sees you as a good man.
5. Send her SPAM for Viagra.
He's driving down the 25 de Mayo highway when suddenly he passes through a toll booth. The toll attendant drives him crazy. Below his window is written: Florencia Fernandez.
1. He greets her kindly and thanks her for her treatment.
2. He leaves his personal card so she can get in touch with him.
3. He remembers her name and adds her on Facebook when he gets home.
4. He adds her on Facebook using Rolando Graña's profile picture.
5. When she doesn't react, he yells at her: You're going to die working at a toll booth, useless!!
You know a girl, invite her to your house for dinner with your parents. At the table are your mom, dad, you, and the lady you want to conquer. After a PERFECT hour of dinner, your father accidentally lets out a pretty noticeable fart, with a sound approximately like this: PRRRRRRR!!
1. You act as if nothing happened.
2. You look at your father with a piercing gaze.
3. He gets up embarrassed and takes your girl to another room.
4. He asks if anyone heard thunder.
5. You ask your girl: Do you want my old man to take you on his motorcycle home? Because I think he's already started it
You invite her to eat at Los Maizales, a restaurant with good food and careful service:
1. You accompany her in choosing the appetizer, then the plate, and finally the dessert, all very delicately ending in ito.
2. Eat normally but carefully, without losing your manners.
3. Take out a Coto supermarket bag from the astronaut jacket pocket and start packing away leftover food, saying: It's for the dog, see?
You know a nice girl through email and decide to add her on MSN and ask for a photo, especially:
1. A normal photo
2. A nude photo
3. Webcam strip tease
4. A photo of her masturbating with a double-ended plug and 3 background painters
You invite her to an electronic party:
1. You start dancing with her.
2. You tell her you're friends with the DJ to gain importance.
3. Invite her to take a Don Perignon in the VIP area.
4. Try to slip some Pepa's plans to her that mixed with a little vodka, possibly she could get drunk with her friends. You invite her to spend Holy Week at a prestigious Bungalow in Mar de las Pampas. On the way, the lady in question needs to go to the bathroom because she's feeling unwell. 1. You speed up to the gas station and wait for her to finish her business. When she returns to the car, you only ask: “Is everything okay?” 2. You stop at a hidden spot on the road and hand her Carilina wipes so she can clean herself. 3. You tell her to take a dump in the bushes, give her a Claringrilla to wipe her ass, film it all with your Motorola Rockr and then upload it to Youtube. They block it for obscene content, so you upload it to Pornhub.com and Poringa.net. She goes to bed with her ideal woman to enjoy the FIRST night of sex. You have to surprise her: 1. You undress her very slowly, start kissing all over her body and turn off the light on the bedside table. 2. Try to surprise her with a bouquet of roses inside the bed for her surprise when she enters. 3. Turn around and force her to watch you masturbating with Sandro's double photo. In summary, the above points are relative and depend on age to know how to approach a woman. From 6 to 17 years old, don't approach her, no matter how headmaster it seems in the photolog, you'll end up with your hands full. From 18 to 26, possibly your freshness and craziness will make her fall in love. From 27 to 35, they're looking for entrepreneurs, people with money and who are at least presentable to their family. From 36 to 45, they're looking for someone who can take them to the movies. From 45 and up, they're looking for someone who will accept their children and bankroll them. A big hug to all, dear brothers!
5 comentários - ¿Deberia estar ud en pareja?